I’m a planning junkie. I love planning my day, my week, my month, my year- hell, I like to plan my decade. It is one of my favorite things I do each Sunday afternoon because it has been such a powerful tool in my life. But, when you have ADHD, planning can seem daunting- so many people with ADHD could start a library with all the planners they own with only 2 weeks filled out.

I know that. I hear and see the struggles every day. But, I keep on working with my clients on it- why? Because once the planning routine is adopted- it can be transformative. Here’s why:

1.    Using a planner saves executive functioning energy

This is by far the biggest reason to use a planner with ADHD. When you have ADHD, you have a limited supply of executive functioning energy so you want to make sure you don’t waste a drop.  Every time you stop a task, then think about what the next thing is you are going to do, plan that next task and start it- you have used up 4 different stores of that precious executive functioning energy.   When you plan ahead of time, however, you batch that executive functioning heavy task at the beginning. This saves your valuable resources and leaves you with more executive functioning energy to spend throughout your day- when you really need it- like focusing on that big project you have due tomorrow.

2.    It allows you to set aside time for the good stuff- family, friends, passions, etc.

I feel extremely lucky.  I love my work and I feel passionate about it.  But it is not my only passion and it is not the only thing that fuels me and fills me with joy.  So I plan my entire day- from when I wake until when I sleep.  I want to make sure that I am planning, holding myself accountable, and creating time to spend with my family, my friends, myself and my other passions.

3.    A planner helps you find balance

I know I look like a 5 year old starting a coloring project but I use 5 different colored erasable pens when I plan my day:  purple for me, pink for clients, blue for writing, green for family and orange for my relationship.  This way, when I look at my week, I know if I am planning to spend my time in a way that feels balanced and even.  Some days and weeks are a lovely balance of all of my colors- each day has some of each and throughout the week I have at least 1 or 2 big chunks of time that are just one color (this allows deep focus for that one area of my life). Other weeks, it’s a bit out of whack- but that is okay- the color coding gives me a warning and then I know when I need to warn my family or myself that I just need to get through a day or two until the balance returns.

4.    Planners give a sense of control over your time and your life

When I look at my week and I see balance as well as time to get done the things that I want to get done, it feels good- really good.  It gives me a sense of calm and control.  I hear myself say “Ive got this.”  Even on those weeks when it is not in balance or when my to do list is too long and there is no chance that I am getting the things done that I want to get done, the planner is still calming- it allows me to prioritize the most important things, find some acceptance with that plan and then enact it, rather than second guessing every step along the way.

5.    Planning helps you understand how long things take

The ADHD brain can struggle to know how long something will take. It doesn’t have many “known times” (established timings for repeated tasks) in its storage bank. Regular use of a planner builds up a list of “known times” because it acts as a time prediction test each day.  I think about how long I think something will take, I then plan for that, I do the thing and I can see if I am right.  I am not doing this with this intention, specifically, but it has that effect and therefore builds that known time storage bank.

6.    Planning helps you create a regular sleep schedule

If I don’t get enough sleep Im a nightmare.  Im cranky, irritable, cant focus and cry at the drop of a hat.  Nothing gets done and I feel bad about myself (and lets face it- other people don’t feel that great about me either). So sleep is my absolute, number 1 priority.  I know my kids get up at 6:45 every morning.  Without fail.  So I need to be ready to go to sleep (not just to bed) at 10:45.  Planning helps me do that.  It helps me work backwards from that time.  If Im going to fall asleep at 10:45, then I need to be in bed at 10, so I need to start my wind-down routine around 9.  That is one of the first things that I put in my planner so that I can work up against that time- realistically estimating how much time I have in my evening and then planning my tasks and activities appropriately.

7.    Knowing how much time you actually have helps you set boundaries and say no

When I look at my planner for this week I see I have 12 hours of “free time.”  That is time that is child-free, client-free and not otherwise spoken for.  5 of those 12 hours are after 7pm and therefore not my best focus time (but good creative time).   So that leaves me with 7 focus hours.  My priorities for the week are to write 2 articles, 1 report and book our travel plans for the next 6 months.  Can I do it?  Yes.  Will it be tight?  Yes.  Can I take anything else on?  No.  There are some weeks that I have more wiggle room and so maybe I will volunteer at my son’s school or agree to meet a friend for lunch or run those extra errands.  But this week is not that week.  If I didn’t map that all out I would say yes to all of those things.  Because I want to do all of those things- they are important to me and appealing.  But my planner is clear- there is not time this week.

8.    Planners ease anxiety

Using my planner allows me to relax and know that things are accounted for- even if I cant get to them all right now, I know I have a plan to do so.  Also, when you plan, it has the side effect of increasing your accountability and dependability.  This also allows you to relax because you start to realize you can count on yourself to show up/ do what you need to do/ remember the thing you need to remember, etc.

9.    Planners provide more space in your working memory for other things

When you hold everything in your head- your to do list (or action list), your appointments, your priorities for the day and your routines your brain have to keep circling to keep that information in your working memory (where we hold active information before we store it away).   The ADHD brain loses track of things when they are out of sight (like information stored in long term memory is) and therefore if something is important it often tries to keep it in active memory when it can be present and active.  In order to do that though it has to constantly revisit those things in order to make sure they are not forgotten.  Its like trying to remember a phone number (back when you had to do that sort of thing)- you need to repeat it over and over in order to assure that it does not leave your brain.  Planning your day, your priorities and your action list lets your brain release all that information and stop circling. This allows more space for other things to fill up your working memory, like what the person in front of you is saying and what you want to ask them.

10.  Planners provide a space to think through the details that can make or break an intention.

It’s the details that so often throw off a plan or a day.  The forgotten gym clothes, the missing lunch, the too-short travel time, etc.  These are the details that keep you from being able to accomplish what you set out to.  When you plan your day ahead of time, you have a workspace to figure those things out.  Are you going to the gym tomorrow morning, showering there, and heading to work right from there?  You will need to pack a bag of work clothes, toiletries as well as layout your clothes for the gym tonight.  Have a meeting 30 minutes away?  You are going to need to build that buffer into your plan in order to get there on time. Without the scratchpad of the planner, it can be very hard to remember those details when you need to.

Planners, when properly executed are powerful tools and a crucial building block to managing ADHD symptoms. Ever wonder how to best use a planner?  Don’t miss my 3-step process to perfect planning!

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Unlocking the secrets of the ADHD brain

ADHD is very poorly named.  People with ADHD don’t actually have a DEFICIT of attention-sometimes there is actually too much attention. And not everyone is hyperactive- in fact, many people with ADHD have a hard time getting going at all.  Sure, struggles with attention or hyperactivity can be part of the ADHD picture but it’s not the case for everyone, and it’s certainly not the only thing that people struggle with.

That’s because ADHD is not a disorder of a lack or deficit of attention but rather a disorder of the REGULATION of attention.  It’s also not a disorder of too much action (hyperactivity) but rather a disorder of the REGULATION of activity.  When you have ADHD you struggle with when and how to turn your attention and action on, how to focus it, where to place it, when to switch it on and how to turn it off.  These skills are called executive functions and I like to think of them as the conductor of our brain’s orchestra.  

The Brain’s Orchestra

Imagine that all of your brain’s abilities and functions were individual members of an orchestra.  Your ability to put ideas together is the violin, your ability to play with words is the bass, your ability to recognize shapes and manipulate them in your head is the oboe, and so on.  Each individual ability has its own instrument and its own piece to play in any given composition.  The executive functioning system is the conductor.  This is the part of the brain that tells the others when to start, when to stop, to work harder, to ease up, get faster or get slower.  This is the part that tells one part to stop playing together while another section builds.  The conductor makes sure everyone is on the same page, is playing the same song, and leads the group so that they can work together.

Have you ever heard an orchestra warm-up and tune up?  It’s not a horrible sound, but I certainly wouldn’t pay to listen to it for 2 hours.  Each individual player is focused on their own instrument - they are each immensely talented and yet as they all play their own tunes the group as a whole sounds pretty bad.  

The ADHD Conductor

The ADHD brain has a conductor (your executive functioning system) which is underpowered.  Its not that there is no conductor at all (though after a long hard day it may seem that way) but the ADHD conductor has less energy than the non-ADHD conductor and so it sometimes has a hard time making it through a particularly long or hard piece because it has so much work to do and it gets depleted early.    And when that conductor is exhausted and asleep at the podium?  Then, those individual orchestra members may be the most talented in the world but the music that comes from that orchestra is going to start to leave a lot to be desired.  

So what do we do to help that conductor? 

Charge it up:

First, we want to give it as much power as we can.  Like the battery meter on your computer or the gas gauge on your car, you want to power up that conductor as much as possible.  You do this with self-care: sleep, exercise, nutrition, and medication. All of these things make sure that the conductor is starting each piece with the most energy possible. 

Outsource

We want to take as much off the conductor’s plate as possible.  So, maybe someone else could take a song, or for some songs, the procession section doesn’t need as much attention.  In the world of the ADHD brain, this is done by habit creation, routine building, system building.  When you automate a task through routine/ habit creation you take the effort out of the executive functioning system and put it in your basal ganglia to enact. This gives your EF (executive functioning0 systems a break and allows it to focus on more important (or at least more novel) tasks.

Limit responsibilities

We don’t tell conductors that they also have to operate the lights or take tickets while working. Similarly, we want to limit the responsibilities of the brain- don’t make it avoid or resist distraction repeatedly- eliminating it ahead of time. For example, it’s much easier to not check your phone if it is on do not disturb mode in your bag than when it is ringing away right beside you. So, limiting the amount of effort the brain has to expend to stay focused through distraction management and environmental management.

Group the brain’s tasks

The conductor is responsible for choosing new music and developing programs but it doesn’t do that while directing a score. Your brain shouldn’t have to do all of its executive functioning tasks at the same time either- it’s exhausting and inefficient. Front-load the planning of your day by using a planner, organize by grouping and enacting tasks, use outlines when writing or find all the phone numbers of all the calls you have to make ahead of time. These are all examples of grouping tasks and front-loading the executive functioning demands of the day.

So, don’t forget about your conductor.  In fact, keep him and his needs front and center.  Give him as much energy as you can and make his job as easy as possible and your orchestra will have the best chance of making use of all that talent within.

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Master Stress-Free Travel with these ADHD Hacks

[2025 Update]

Your flight leaves in exactly 175 minutes, and here you are, frozen, staring at an empty suitcase with the remnants of your entire closet strewn all around you. 

Is that third pair of flip-flops necessary?  How many beach books are too many? Are sweaters really essential for Hawaii? Should I pack it all and figure it out later?!? AHHHH!  Why does this happen every single time?!?

You’re not alone.  The suitcase scaries are a very real thing for ADHD brains. 

The whirlwind of deciding what to bring (and sometimes, even more difficult, what NOT to bring) and how to make it all fit—all the while assuring that nothing is forgotten—quickly becomes an overwhelming executive functioning nightmare. 

And for good reason! There’s a TON about the process that requires that very special blend of skills (I’m looking at you, executive functions) that tax an ADHD brain to the max.  Which is why (like so many things ADHD) understanding what’s going on in the brain helps us figure out exactly what it is we need to do to make it manageable.

So put down the Fodors, grab a cup of coffee, and let’s dig in!

Why Packing Feelings Like and ADHD Obstacle Course

Beach days, sightseeing adventures, or a cozy cabin getaway all sound like great ideas until we’re faced with an empty suitcase and have no idea how on earth we are going to fill it!  

For ADHD brains, the pre-trip packing phase quickly morphs sunshine and sandals into a full-blown obstacle course, which usually makes us descend into the 3-step ADHD Packing Cycle :

1. Avoid at all costs!  First, our ever-energy-saving brains try to avoid using up all that gas.  They avoid, delay, procrastinate, bargain- anything to keep from doing it!

2. Drain the Tank: Once enough time has passed and it’s clear that turbo gas needs to be used, we get started. But so often, by that time, we don’t have enough turbo gas to finish the job, and we’re left like a broken-down engine on the side of the road. 

3. Overwhelm: Once the tank is empty, it’s not just decision-making or organization that breaks down; our emotional control goes right out the window as well, leaving us crying into a half-full suitcase. (No? That’s just me!?! Oh, well—hand me the tissues, please.)  

… and we’re right back at step 1- Avoid, avoid, avoid!!!

The 5 Challenges of ADHD Packing (and strategies to tackle them)

So let’s explore the executive functioning gas-guzzling packing pitfalls and make an ADHD-friendly plan that tackles each one.

1. The Challenge: The Planning Puzzle: 

Sometimes, thinking through what we’re actually going to do on that 10-day trip to the mountains feels like one step too many for our executive functioning-depleted brains. We booked the flights, we hired the car— that’s enough, right?!? 

Of course, it FEELS like it should be!  That’s a huge executive functioning lift you just did!! Research confirms what our planning-weary brains already know- planning a trip is a many-step, hierarchical, executive functioning obstacle course! (1)  

ADHD-Friendly Strategy: Mood Board Your Trip

You did the thing!  You planned the trip!  So give yourself a huge pat on the back, go have a delicious snack, and get a good night’s sleep- job very well done!  

AND… once that EF regulation tank is full again- now it’s time to start mapping out the days. 

 I’m not talking about a minute-to-minute agenda.  But what are some of the things you want to do while you’re away? Make a list. Once you’ve got that vacation bucket list, pretend you're creating a mood board for each activity. Picture yourself conquering that mountain hike – what will keep you comfy? Vision is key to conquering this packing puzzle.

2. Future Forecasting:  

The Challenge: Forecasting doesn’t just mean checking out the weather app.  It means thinking through the possible eventualities (and not just in a worst-case-scenario spiral kind of way!)   It’s projecting yourself into the future and looking around- what might happen?  What might I need?  What do I want to do?

But projecting yourself into the future and thinking the logistics through is like an executive functioning sundae (though a whole lot less delicious!).  It’s layer after layer of executive functioning tasks like stopping, monitoring, inhibiting, and planning.  

So, understandably, ADHD brains often skip over forecasting altogether.

The problem is that when we don’t forecast, we often end up in a foreign land without an idea of what we can do there and without the things we need to enjoy it.

ADHD-Friendly Forecasting Strategy: Detail that Mood Board

This is where that bucket list mood board comes in handy. Think through the things you want to do as well as the things you will do no matter what (eat, sleep, shower, etc.). Imagine yourself doing these things and ask yourself the questions: What will I need? What’s likely to happen? 

 Make a list of what you might need in each of those instances and think through the likely hiccups in those plans—things like rain, cold, or dead batteries. You don’t need to plan for every eventuality, but packing the most likely ones will go a long way toward making them all feel a lot less vacation-ruining! 

3. Decision Day: 

The Challenge: Ugh, the dreaded "to pack or not to pack" debate. This is where that indecisive gremlin really likes to show up, making each item feel like a full-length, prime-time presidential debate (with a whole lot less mud-slinging, I hope!).

It might feel silly- why is it so exhausting to choose between the pink or purple flip-flops?!?  

But let’s break it down. 

Each of those either/or debates is really a series of – yup! You guessed it! – executive functioning tasks. You have to decide what the possibilities are, match up those possibilities to the occasion, the outfit, etc., and then forecast (the EF sundae) which ones will be best. AND THEN you have to choose!

Ugh! I’m exhausted just thinking about it!

ADHD friendly Decision Making Strategy: Check-list

You might be sick of hearing me say make a list- but it’s really key! 

Why?!? 

Well, when you make that list of the things you need, you cut out half of that EF work ahead of time. Before you looked at your closet, you decided what you needed, and now you just need to go hunting for it.

Will there still be a debate over purple or green?  Yes.  But your brain won’t be so exhausted by the time you get there that making that choice will feel a lot easier!  

So, use that vacation bucket list mood board and all that great forecasting from step 1 to make a list of must-haves. Consider whether that "just in case" outfit is worth the suitcase space. Remember, you can always buy essentials on the trip (and hey, that souvenir straw hat might be cuter anyway!).

4. Organization Olympics: 

The Challenge: Packing cubes? Rolled clothes?  Forget fancy terms and complicated systems – think "open suitcase, panic attack, repeat." 

Just kidding!  

There is a middle ground between packing panic and a Marie Kando suitcase extravaganza, I promise!

ADHD-friendly Packing Organization Strategy: Ditch Perfection

The key to ADHD-friendly packing organization is finding a system that works for you and giving yourself a whole bunch of grace if that system isn’t beautiful.

Maybe you color-code your essentials or dedicate a corner to each day's outfit, or maybe it’s just about getting it all in and figuring it out when you get there.

Whatever works, works.

The goal is really just transporting all your stuff without causing a suitcase explosion (especially that sunscreen – leaky sunscreen = travel nightmare!).  It doesn’t need to be a color-coded Insta-worthy masterpiece.  Just get it all in.

5. Emotional Check-In: 

So this one really should be numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5. Packing can be is stressful, especially when the clock is ticking. It depletes our executive functioning resources, leaving us with little left to manage our mounting stress, overwhelm, and frustration.

ADHD-friendly Emotional Check-in Strategy: Grace over Guilt

Let’s first agree that packing is hard. If it’s stressing you out, that’s normal. Step 1 in navigating the emotional side of packing is dropping the judgment about it. (It's a whole lot easier said than done, for sure, but essential nonetheless.)

Now, the key to managing your emotions while packing is to combine all of the 4 steps we already discussed (because keeping that EF tank full is pretty darn essential to keeping your emotions from zooming up to 1000) and…

taking breaks.

Yup- stepping away from the overwhelm is the very best thing you can do when it all starts to feel too much.

Go do something else for a bit. Come back to it with fresh eyes and maybe a calming playlist. And remember- you can always grab that toothbrush you forgot when you get there!

12 Smart ADHD Packing Tips

Okay, so you’ve got your five steps. But there are 12 more tips, tricks, and hacks that can really make the packing process go a whole lot more smoothly. Work them all in, or maybe just grab one or two for your next global adventure and experience the relief they can bring!

1. Use checklists: You may have noticed from the ADHD-friendly strategies above- lists are key! They dramatically reduce your EF load, making it all feel easier and less overwhelming. Want to save yourself some time? Create a master packing checklist and use it for every trip. You can have specific lists for different types of trips (work trips, beach trips, ski trips, etc.) or a general one that you modify slightly each time.

2. Start early: Ok- this is a tough one.  The time pressure doesn’t usually kick in until about 90 minutes before your flight takes off, right?!?  But you can avoid the headless chicken routine by packing a few days in advance to avoid last-minute stress. This creates time to remember forgotten items and make thoughtful decisions.  So try using a body double or some other interpersonal pressure to start working your way through the list a few days before you leave.

3. Use a packing app: Digital tools like PackPoint or TripIt can help organize packing lists and offer reminders of essentials.  It’s a great way to shortcut the checklist step!

4. Roll clothes: I know- it feels so very Marie Kando, but there was a real method to her not-so-madness! Rolling clothes instead of folding them saves space and reduces wrinkles. It also makes it easier to see everything in the suitcase, so ditch the fold and fall in love with the roll.

5. Pack by outfit: Plan outfits for each day and pack them together. This ensures everything essential will be in the case while avoiding overpacking—plus it helps create a put-together look for the whole vacation. Strike that stylish beach pose!

6. Double-check medications: Confirm enough medication is packed for the entire trip, plus a few extra days in case of delays. Pro tip—keep it in your carry-on.

7. Invest in packing cubes: My family just invested (and it’s not a huge investment) in packing cubes, and I’m fully in love! Packing cubes keep everything organized, separate, and straightforwardly categorized. Sets can vary but might include bags for clothes, laundry, shoes, and toiletries, making it much easier to keep track of things.  We have a different color set for each family member. That way, we can put all our stuff in just 1 or 2 suitcases but then pull them out, and the cubes go right in the drawer!

8. Embrace the power of labels: Labeling things like packing cubes and suitcase compartments makes it easy to keep track of what’s where— meaning no more rummaging around in a panic for those designer shades.

9. Use a travel wallet: Keep important documents like passports and boarding passes in a dedicated travel wallet for easy access. No more scrambling around in a panic at the check-in desk!  I love a sling bag for this- it’s just big enough for my phone, passports, tickets, and meds- but not much else, so I don’t have to go rooting around my backpack.

10. Buy travel toiletries: Are you sick of stressing out about how many full-sized toiletries will fit into the case? Buy a set of travel toiletries instead, and keep your toiletry bag fully loaded. Bonus—it also means there’ll be less stuff to carry home. Just don’t forget to pack them all in an airport-friendly transparent bag.

11. Use a gadget case: Gadget cases are lifesavers when it comes to packing. They’re ideal for keeping multiple adaptors, cables, and devices organized and safe. 

12. Try body doubling: Body doubling is a terrific ADHD hack that creates accountability and companionship when completing the tasks involved in traveling. This can include packing alongside someone else or simply finding someone to swap motivating messages and reminders with. 

Beat the ADHD suitcase scaries for good 

Vacation planning while managing ADHD can be a challenge, for sure!  But traveling can be an amazing boon for the ADHD brain! All the novelty, all the challenge, all the adventure! It can feel like rocket fuel for the stimulation-seeking ADHD brain!

By understanding how executive functions work and breaking down the process into manageable steps, it’s possible to reduce stress and be well-prepared for any adventure. Whether it’s an Amazonian trek or beachside bliss, it’s all under control.

Bon voyage!

For more vacation tips, check out this post on Traveling with ADHD.

Join the conversation 

Is packing a nightmare for you? Or do you have smart ADHD hacks for packing that you want to share? Post a comment below and tell us about it.

• Reference:

  1. Choi, S., Lehto, X. Y., Morrison, A. M., & Jang, S. (Shawn). (2012). Structure of Travel Planning Processes and Information Use Patterns. Journal of Travel Research, 51(1), 26-40. https://doi.org/10.1177/0047287510394191

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

This online course has been designed specifically to help teach the strategies ADHD brains need to help them move from overwhelm  and meltdowns to confident emotional mastery.

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Your Guide to Managing Sensory Overload, Time Blindness, and Executive Function Challenges

You’re in a Moroccan souk at sunset; the air spiced with saffron and cedarwood, when it hits you: This is your ADHD brain unleashed. Your gaze leaps from cobalt-blue tiles to a vendor flawlessly pouring mint tea, your mind firing questions—How does he pour it so high? What’s that spice?—as you fumble through Arabic and land in laughter, swapping stories with a stranger-turned-friend. For once, your racing thoughts aren’t chaos—they’re curiosity electrified. Novelty fuels you. Every detour feels like destiny.

But the exact same differences about your brain that can make these traveling moments feel like magic- they have a flip side: 

• What starts as a spontaneous stroll through Tokyo’s neon-lit streets can spiral into overwhelm when sensory overload hits. 

• The hyperfocus that lets you devour a museum exhibit for hours might mean missing your train. 

• And that brilliant “go with the flow” mindset? It crashes hard when time blindness leaves you sprinting through an airport

So, how do you soak up every moment of travel magic when all those moments require jumping over so many ADHD hurdles to get there?!? 

The secret isn’t fighting your ADHD—it’s working with it. By pairing your brain’s hunger for adventure with strategies to ground its chaos, you can savor the spontaneity and sidestep the stress. Here’s how to make your next trip as rewarding as your wanderlust deserves.

Why Traveling Is Great for ADHD Brains: The Science-Backed Benefits

For ADHD brains, travel isn’t just a getaway—it can feel like a neurological reset. From dopamine-boosting novelty to the rhythm of movement, here’s why exploring the world aligns perfectly with how ADHD brains thrive.

1. Novelty: Your Brain’s Dopamine Power-Up

ADHD brains are wired to crave novelty, and travel delivers it in spades. New sights, sounds, and experiences trigger dopamine release, a neurotransmitter critical for motivation and reward processing (Volkow et al., 2011). For individuals with ADHD, who often have lower baseline dopamine levels, novelty acts like a “reset button,” reigniting focus and engagement (Tripp & Wickens, 2008) in a way that feels so good! 

2. Challenge: Igniting Hyperfocus and Flow

ADHD brains thrive under optimal challenge—tasks that are stimulating but not overwhelming. Travel can naturally provide this balance. Navigating a foreign subway system, decoding a menu in another language, or hiking a rugged trail all require problem-solving that taps into ADHD strengths like creativity and resilience. Research shows that moderate cognitive challenges improve attention and reduce impulsivity by increasing arousal to an ideal level (Antshel et al., 2013). Think of it as your brain firing on all cylinders, turning obstacles into adventures.

3. Movement: Walking Your Way to Calm

Travel often means walking more—exploring cities, hiking trails, or meandering through museums. This physical activity isn’t just good for your step count; it’s a brain booster. Exercise increases dopamine and norepinephrine, neurotransmitters that enhance focus and mood (Pontifex et al., 2013). A study by Gapin et al. (2011) found that even mild physical activity improves attention in ADHD brains. So, that sunrise walk along the Amalfi Coast? It’s not just scenic—it’s science-backed self-regulation.

4. Connection: Social Fuel for Emotional Regulation

Travel’s social side—reconnecting with family, bonding with friends, or chatting with locals—can stabilize ADHD brains. Positive social interactions release oxytocin, reducing stress and improving emotional regulation (Canu & Carlson, 2007). Shared experiences also create structure, which ADHD brains often crave. A 2010 study noted that supportive peer relationships mitigate ADHD-related social challenges, fostering a sense of belonging (Mikami et al., 2010). Whether you’re laughing over gelato in Rome or swapping stories with a tuk-tuk driver in Bali, connection grounds you

But all that great stuff? It’s a bit of a tightrope walk, right?!?

The very traits that make travel exhilarating for ADHD brains—novelty-seeking, spontaneity, hyperfocus—can also turn a dream trip into a comedy of errors. Let’s break down the sneaky challenges that love to crash the adventure party:

The ADHD Travel Tightrope: Why Traveling is Hard on ADHD Brains

Novelty Overload → Routine Meltdown
New places and experiences are dopamine gold… until the lack of routine leaves you frazzled. Without familiar anchors (like that morning coffee ritual), even simple tasks—like finding breakfast—can feel like solving a Rubik’s cube blindfolded.

• Executive Function Hurdles
  Planning, organizing, and time management? ADHD brains often treat these like optional extras. Weak working memory might mean forgotten reservations (“Wait, did I book the hotel for Tuesday or Wednesday?”), while impulse control issues could lead to overpacking (“Why do I have three snorkels?!”).
  

• Time Blindness Strikes Again
  That “quick museum stop” turns into a 3-hour deep dive into Renaissance art… and suddenly you’re sprinting to catch a train that left 20 minutes ago. Time blindness doesn’t care about schedules.
  

• Sensory Overload Landmines
  A bustling Thai street market is a feast for the senses—until the smells, shouts, and neon lights collide into a sensory tsunami. What started as excitement can flip to overwhelm in seconds.
  

• Impulsivity’s Plot Twists
  Spontaneity is fun… until you’re impulsively booking a hot-air balloon ride in Cappadocia, only to realize it costs half your trip budget.

Harnessing the ADHD Travel Sparkle: 

Tried-and-True Meets Outside-the-Box Travel Hacks and Strategies

Let’s be honest: “Just make a list!” or “Set more alarms!” can feel like advice from a well-meaning (but deeply irritating) GPS that keeps recalculating while you’re already lost. For ADHD brains, conventional travel tips often land with an eye-roll—not because they’re wrong, but because they ignore the messy, creative reality of how an ADHD brain works. Yes, packing lists and calendars are useful. But when you’ve heard them a thousand times from neurotypical brains who’ve never once missed a flight because they hyperfocused on airport carpet patterns, resentment builds.

The key isn’t ditching the classics—it’s remixing them. By pairing evidence-backed strategies with playful, ADHD-friendly twists, you can create a system that’s both practical and actually doable. Think of it like adding glitter to a spreadsheet: the boring bits get a dopamine upgrade, and suddenly, “planning” feels less like a chore and more like a choose-your-own-adventure game. Ready to blend some brain hacks? Let’s dive in.

Your ADHD Travel Toolkit

Planning & Organizing

The Struggle: Forgetting essentials, overpacking, or losing reservations.
The Fixes:

PACKING

• Hyper-detailed lists → Yes, they’re obvious, but they work because they offload memory. ADHD brains often struggle with “invisible” tasks, so writing down “toothbrush” or “passport” forces those items into your awareness.  

• If the idea of a list makes you gag, try a visual packing list by using a Pinterest board, or go old school and create a cutout collage list

• Visual reminders → Laying out essentials early tackles “object permanence” struggles and makes sure those key items get in the bag.

• Scavenger Hunt Packing: Turn packing into a game by “finding” all the items on your list as fast as you can. Dopamine + productivity = win.

• Pre-Packed “Go Bags”: Keep reusable bags stocked for common scenarios (beach day, airport survival), so you’re not starting from zero.  The key here is to have enough things (think multiple toothbrushes, chargers, etc., that you can keep your go bags packed and ready)

PLANNING

• Trip apps (TripIt, Google Keep) → Automate reservation tracking to avoid email chaos.

• Virtual Planning Party: Video call a friend while you book hotels or pack. Their presence = fewer “Wait, did I confirm that Airbnb?!” moments.

• Public Bets: Tell a hostel buddy or local your plans (“I’m catching the 9 am train!”)—social accountability boosts follow-through.

Time Blindness

The Struggle: Missing flights, losing track of time, or underestimating tasks.

The Strategies:

• Backward planning → Start with your departure time and work backward. Bland but effective- so add some sparkle by turning it into a song, playing a movie in your head in reverse, or even writing it out in colored pen

• Alarms with personality → Less snooze-button energy, more “Move your feet or miss your seat!”

• 15-Minute Fire Drills: Race a timer to knock out tasks (“Pack toiletries in 15 mins!”). Reward yourself with a TikTok scroll.

• Adventure Soundtracks: Create playlists (“Airport Zen,” “Sightseeing Bops”) to cue your brain into different travel modes.

Sensory Overload

The Struggle: Crowds, noise, or unfamiliar smells draining your battery.

The Fix:

• Noise-canceling headphones → A tried and true classic for a reason.  Headphones are a no-brainer for muting chaos.

• Quiet-time quotas → Scheduling downtime prevents meltdowns.  Make sure you have 1-2 quiet moments or activities in each day.

• Scent Switcheroo: Dab familiar essential oils (lavender, citrus) on your wrist to counter overwhelming smells.

• Tactile Tokens: Keep a textured item (smooth stone, fidget ring) in your pocket for grounding during sensory storms.

Impulsivity & Forgetfulness

The Struggle: Overspending, losing items, or derailing plans.

The Fix:

• Prepaid cards → Limits budget blowouts. I know, I know.  The idea isn’t exciting but it sure beats the “how the heck am I going to pay this credit card bill” feeling when you get home.

• The Dice Decide: Assign activities to dice numbers and roll for spontaneity (*1 = street food hunt, 2 = hidden bookstore*). Satisfies impulsivity safely.

Tips for Managing Sleep, Food & Routines

The Struggle: Jet lag, hunger rage, or losing daily rhythms.

The Fix:

• Snack stashes → Prevents hangry meltdowns. Obvious? Yes. Vital? Also yes.

• Sleep toolkits → Eye masks and white noise apps are sleep savers.

• “Adventure Anchors”: Plan 1-2 loose daily anchors (sunset walk, local market) instead of rigid schedules. Flexibility without chaos!

• Curiosity-Driven Hyperfocus: Book a niche workshop (Turkish coffee brewing, neon sign making) to channel hyperfocus into engaged learning.

Embrace the Journey, ADHD, and All

Traveling with ADHD isn’t about erasing the quirks of your brain—it’s about rewriting the script to let those quirks shine. Yes, time blindness might have you sprinting through airports, and sensory overload could turn a bustling market into a temporary nightmare. But remember: the same ADHD brain that loses track of minutes is also the one that spots hidden street art, dives into spontaneous conversations, and turns a missed train into an unexpected adventure.

By blending tried-and-true strategies (lists, alarms, prepaid cards) with creative, dopamine-friendly hacks (scavenger hunt packing, emoji itineraries, sensory reset kits), you’re not just surviving travel—you’re redefining it. These tools aren’t about perfection; they’re about giving yourself permission to stumble, adapt, and laugh when things go sideways.

So pack your noise-canceling headphones, your curiosity, and a hefty dose of self-compassion. Missed flights and forgotten chargers? They’re plot twists in your travel story. What matters is the joy of discovery, the thrill of new connections, and the pride of knowing you navigated it all your way.

Your next adventure isn’t just possible—it’s waiting for you to claim it. 🌍✨

Now, go wander. And when you return, tell us: What’s the quirkiest, most ADHD-friendly travel hack you discovered? Share your stories below—we’re all in this messy, marvelous journey together.

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How to Manage Criticism and Fear and Thrive in Your Job

If you have an ADHD brain, you know that work can feel like navigating a minefield of potential criticism—even when none exists. Rejection sensitivity (RS), that intense emotional reaction to perceived rejection or failure, can turn a simple email or casual comment into a spiral of self-doubt. In this article, we’ll unpack how RSD shows up at work, why ADHD brains are wired for this struggle and science-backed strategies to help you thrive. 

It’s 9:03 AM on a Tuesday, and Alex (name changed to protect the overthinker) is feeling oddly victorious. They’ve just submitted a project they poured two hyperfocused nights into—complete with color-coded spreadsheets and a PowerPoint that would make Marie Kondo proud. “This time,” they think, “my manager has to notice how hard I’ve worked.”

Cue the email notification.

Subject line: “Quick chat about the report?”

Alex’s stomach drops. Their brain, ever the dramatic narrator, instantly spins a tale: “They hated it. I’m getting demoted. Why did I even try?” By the time they slink into the meeting, their manager’s actual words—“Let’s streamline the data section”—morph into a deafening roar: “You failed.”

Sound familiar?

With an ADHD brain, workdays like Alex’s aren’t just “stressful”—they’re often emotional obstacle courses where even mild feedback can feel like a personal indictment. This isn’t “being too sensitive.” It’s rejection sensitivity (also known as rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD)), a hallmark of ADHD that turns everyday interactions into emotional earthquakes.

So, let’s investigate and explore why this happens and what we can do to make our days less like obstacle courses and more like victory laps.

Understanding ADHD Rejection Sensitivity (RSD): Why Work Feels Like an Emotional Minefield

ADHD isn’t just about focus—it’s about feeling deeply. Research shows that up to 99% of adults with ADHD experience RSD (Dodson, 2016), a term coined by Dr. William Dodson to describe the extreme emotional pain triggered by perceived criticism or rejection. 

In the workplace, where feedback and social hierarchies are constant, ADHD brains often misinterpret neutral interactions as personal attacks.

The workplace, where feedback and social hierarchies are constant, therefore, can feel like a minefield of emotional triggers. 

Why does this happen?

1. A Lifetime of Criticism → Shame → Hypervigilance

In a neurotypical world, the natural traits of ADHD brains—forgetfulness, impulsivity, or emotional intensity—are all too often labeled as “too much,” “lazy,” or “dramatic.” Years of external criticism (think: “Why can’t you just try harder?”) seed deep-rooted shame, teaching the brain to scan for rejection like a survival skill.

Result: ADHD brains become hypervigilant. A coworker’s delayed email reply or a manager’s neutral tone isn’t just neutral—it’s a potential threat. Think of it as emotional PTSD: past rejections wire the brain to expect future ones.

2. The Neurotypical Misunderstanding Trap

The workplace is built for neurotypical norms. Traits like distractibility, emotional honesty, or needing movement are often misinterpreted as “unprofessional” or “careless.” For example:

• Time blindness → “You’re irresponsible.”

• Passionate brainstorming → “You’re disruptive.”

This mismatch means ADHD brains do face more frequent criticism for simply existing in a neurotypical world. Worse, the criticism often targets core aspects of identity, making it cut deeper.

3. Ambiguity = Danger: Why Neutral Feels Negative

ADHD brains are wired to detect patterns—even where they don’t exist. Combine this with hypervigilance, and ambiguous situations become RSD fuel:

• A silent Zoom chat → “They’re all judging me.”

• A manager’s quick “Thanks!” email → “They’re annoyed I asked for help.”

Studies show ADHD brains process social cues differently, often skewing toward threat detection (Shaw et al., 2014). It’s not paranoia—it’s a brain trying to protect itself.

Why Rejection Hurts So Much: The Double Whammy of History and Neurobiology

When rejection (real or perceived) strikes, ADHD brains feel it often hits like a tidal wave, hitting hard and fast often before you even realize it’s coming.  And there are two main reasons why:

1. The Ghosts of Rejections Past
Growing up, kids with ADHD are on the receiving end of A LOT of criticism and rejection- significantly more than neurotypical kids (1,2).  (Though, that number of 15,000 critiques by the age of 8 is a myth- the principle behind the number remains true).

Which means that each new critique doesn’t just carry its own weight—it drags along every previous rejection. Think of it as emotional compounding interest meaning that today’s feedback taps into decades of stored shame.

2. The Neurobiological Fireworks
ADHD brains have numerous tangible differences that cause it to feel emotional pain more intensely and more frequently, including inferences in:

• Prefrontal Cortex: Less activity in this “emotional brakes” region means feelings flood in unchecked. (3,4)

• Amygdala Hyperactivity: The brain’s “alarm system” is on high alert, magnifying perceived threats. (3,4)

• Dopamine Dysregulation: Dopamine-diffusion differences impair the brain’s ability to soothe itself after stress. (3,4)

• Limbic Sensitivity: The emotional centers are hypersensitive like a volume knob stuck on “max.” (3,4)
  

Together, this history and these neurobiological differences turn an everyday critique into an emotional avalanche of pain, shame, and often depression.

“Did I Mess Up?”: How RSD Manifests in Professional Settings

If you’ve ever left a meeting convinced your career was over because your manager said, “Let’s revisit this next week,” congratulations! Consider yourself part of the rejection-sensitive ADHD crew (it’s a painful but pretty amazing tribe!). 

For ADHD brains, everyday workplace interactions can feel like navigating a game of emotional Whac-A-Mole—except the moles are disguised as innocuous comments, and the mallet is your racing thoughts and a tidal wave of emotions that follow along.

Let’s break down three classic rejection-sensitive work traps:

•  Constructive Criticism = Existential Crisis
  The email: “Great start! Let’s refine the budget.”
  Your brain: “You’re a fraud. Update LinkedIn.”
  Why? Neurotypical brains see feedback as a roadmap. Your ADHD brain, wired to detect threats after years of criticism, hears a siren blaring “DANGER!” Thanks, amygdala.

• Silence = Career Death
  The meeting: You bite your tongue to avoid sounding “too much.”
  Your brain: “Remember when they rolled their eyes? Never speak again.”
  Why? RSD isn’t just fear of rejection—it’s anticipating rejection. Past awkward moments play on a loop, convincing you that silence is safer (even if your ideas are gold).

• Casual Jokes = Office Conspiracy

  The comment: “Late again, huh?”
  Your brain: By lunch, you’ve scripted an HR investigation.
  Why? ADHD brains are threat detectives. A joke becomes evidence of your “unlikability,” while your coworker forgets it by noon.
  
  

This Isn’t “All in Your Head” (But Kinda Is)

You didn’t wake up one morning and decide to see and feel rejection at every corner, and you’re not doing it because it’s fun or you’re “just being a baby” (or whatever else that hyper-critical voice in your brain tells you).  No- this is the standard-issue functioning of the brain you were born with (as are a whole host of awesome things, by the way!)

We can blame biology (with a dash of history thrown in):

• Your brain processes emotions at warp speed, leaving logic in the dust.

• Dopamine droughts make self-soothing harder than assembling IKEA furniture.

• Past rejections stack like trauma Legos, priming you to expect criticism.

You’re not broken. Your brain’s just stuck in overdrive— so let’s talk about how to navigate these oh-so-big feelings in the obstacle course that works with an ADHD brain.

From Panic to Power: Managing RSD at Work with ADHD-Smart Strategies

When rejection sensitivity hijacks your workday, it’s easy to feel trapped in a loop of these emotional tidal waves and feel like you can’t possibly get out.

But here’s the secret- You really only need to remember to do one thing in the moment: Get Space. 

Why? Because by creating even a tiny buffer between trigger and reaction, you give your amygdala (the brain’s alarm system) time to quiet—letting your prefrontal cortex (the wise CEO) step back in. Here’s how to make it work:

1. Press Pause: Why Space Saves the Day

Rejection responses thrive on urgency. Getting out of the situation and away from the people, places, and things that triggered you:

• Protects you: Prevents knee-jerk reactions (e.g., quitting over a critique).

• Protects others: Spares colleagues from unintended emotional shrapnel.

• Disrupts the stress cycle: Cortisol production slows once the brain perceives safety, which an intentional pause can trigger (5)

How to make it work at work: It can feel hard to get space in a professional way.  But excusing yourself to the bathroom is almost always acceptable.  I also always recommend having an automatic response you can pull out whenever you need like: “I need to process this—let me circle back in a little bit.”

2. DBT Hacks to Short-Circuit the Rejection Response

DBT skills have been found to be ADHD-brain gold when it comes to managing the intense emotions that so often come with an ADHD brain. Science-backed quick fixes (or at least quick feeling reducers) include:

• Cold Water Splash: Dunk your face in icy water for 15 seconds. It triggers the dive reflex, slowing your heart rate (7).

• Micro-Burst Exercise: 20 squats in the bathroom or a brisk walk around the block. Movement burns off stress hormones (6).

• Progressive Muscle Relaxation: Tense/release muscles from toes to head. Signals safety to your nervous system.

• Paced Breathing: The 4-7-8 method (inhale 4 sec, hold 7, exhale 8) triggers the vagus nerve signals to slow the heart rate.

3. Talk It Out (But Choose Wisely)

• Friend Check-In: “I’m spiraling—can I reality-test this email with you?”

• Therapist Support: A pro can help unpack RSD’s roots and reframe triggers.

Pro Tip: Avoid venting to coworkers mid-spiral. Save it for your therapist or ADHD-savvy confidant.

4. When RSD Won’t Quit: Time to Call in the Experts

If RSD is tanking your job joy or confidence, therapy isn’t a “last resort”—it’s a power move. Look for:

• Expert ADHD-Informed Therapists: They get rejection sensitivity and workplace masking.

• DBT, CBT, and ACT Specialists (but only those well-versed in adapting those techniques for ADHD brains): These specific therapy modalities are proven to help reframe emotional reactions for people with ADHD (1).

Struggling to find help? The Center for ADHD’s top-tier ADHD experts specialize in rejection sensitivity in adults. Because you deserve strategies tailored to your brilliant, sensitive brain.

5. Bonus Tools for the Win

• Pre-Work “RSD Prep”: Jot down 3 strengths before meetings that are likely to trigger rejection reactions  (e.g., “I’m detail-oriented”).

• Post-Stress Ritual: A 5-minute walk or playlist that cues calm.

• Boundary Scripts: “I do my best work with written feedback. Can you email your thoughts?”

Embracing the Strengths of Rejection Sensitivity at Work

Living with ADHD’s rejection sensitivity is like carrying an internal alarm that’s always scanning for threats—even in quiet moments. The workplace, with its unwritten rules and casual critiques, can amplify this, turning a stray comment into an emotional landslide. It’s exhausting, and it’s okay to admit that. Your brain isn’t “too much”; it’s wired to protect you in a world that often misunderstands depth as drama.

But here’s the quiet truth: That same sensitivity—the one that leaves you raw in the face of criticism—is also the root of your greatest strengths. Your brain’s radar for subtle emotions makes you attuned to others’ needs, a gift in teamwork and leadership. The intensity you feel fuels creativity and problem-solving that others might miss. And the resilience you’ve built from navigating rejection? It’s the kind of grit that turns challenges into breakthroughs.

And guess what?
The world (and your workplace) needs minds that notice what others overlook, that care deeply, and that refuse to settle for “good enough.” So, on the days it all feels too heavy, remember: Your ADHD brain isn’t just surviving the workplace—it’s quietly reshaping it. Not in spite of its sensitivity but because of it.

• References:

  1. Daley, D., Sonuga-Barke, E. J., & Thompson, M. (2003). Assessing expressed emotion in mothers of preschool AD/HD children: psychometric properties of a modified speech sample. The British journal of clinical psychology, 42(Pt 1), 53–67. https://doi.org/10.1348/014466503762842011

  2. Beaton, D.M., Sirois, F. & Milne, E. Self-compassion and Perceived Criticism in Adults with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Mindfulness 11, 2506–2518 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-020-01464-w

  3. Malik, S. (2024). Perspective Chapter: Emotion Regulation in Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) – A Lifespan Perspective. IntechOpen. doi: 10.5772/intechopen.1006539

  4. Beheshti, A., Chavanon, ML. & Christiansen, H. Emotion dysregulation in adults with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder: a meta-analysis. BMC Psychiatry 20, 120 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1186/s12888-020-2442-7

  5. Sapolsky, R. M. (2004).Why zebras don’t get ulcers: The acclaimed guide to stress, stress-related diseases, and coping (3rd ed.). Holt Paperbacks.

  6. Ratey, J. J. (2008).Spark: The revolutionary new science of exercise and the brain. Little, Brown Spark.

  7. Linehan, M. M. (2014).DBT skills training manual (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

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by Christine Hargrove, Ph.D.

There’s a phase we use often in my family: “Sunshine is a great disinfectant.”  We started saying this when we were cloth diapering our kids – hanging the diapers to dry in the bright sunshine removed the stains and stink with minimal damage to the fabric. 

The truth of this phrase applies to nearly every area of life- including ADHD Money Management. You’d be surprised how much can be resolved – and with less damage -- when you have the courage to bring the crappy parts of your life into the light. There is immense power in facing the dirty details of life, and the more often you do it, the easier it gets.

Understanding ADHD and Money Stress

Money – or more specifically, money stress – is a part of life that tends to fester in the dank, dark corners. The more it festers, the more its telltale stink wafts through our homes, our relationships, our lives. For those living with ADHD, money stress may feel impossible to get rid of. It can feel like our only options are to live with it or burn the house down. 

If you’ve ever felt like this, please keep reading – especially if you have tried (and failed) to fix your ADHD money management issues by following conventional advice. 

I’ve spent years chasing down why ADHD can make money management so messy, and I have some recommendations on how to make your money management and financial planning efforts more ADHD-friendly.

The 4 Main Impacts of ADHD on Finances

There are 4 main reasons that living with ADHD can make it harder to earn, manage, and save your money. Let’s dig in and see what’s going on here.

1. ADHD and Income: How ADHD Affects Your Earning Potential

The research is clear: ADHD can affect your income in a big way. Why? ADHD can make it difficult to finish a degree or professional training program, be productive on the job, keep a job, manage entrepreneurship well (if you try it, which many of us do), and earn salaries in line with the general population. 

2. ADHD and Budgeting: Struggles with Budgeting and Bill Payments

Next, ADHD makes money management harder. On the organizational side, ADHD makes it harder to maintain a realistic budget, pay bills on time, and maintain a good credit score (which can matter for job applications, rental agreements, and loans). It also makes it harder to sort through your financial conundrums – looking at all aspects of a financial situation, figuring out what the relevant financial details are, and piecing them together in a prioritized action plan of attack. 

3. ADHD and Emotions: The Emotional Toll of Financial Stress

ADHD also makes it hard to handle emotional stress, and, lemmetellya, facing your finances is often extremely stressful. More on this later.

4. ADHD and Saving: The Chaotic Temporal Discounting Duo

It’s harder to save your money when you have ADHD. The challenges posed by income and money management troubles certainly contribute to lower savings, but I think there’s another element at play as well: temporal discounting. Temporal discounting means that the farther a reward or consequence is in the future, the less relevant it feels right now. ADHD and temporal discounting are the chaotic power couple you wish had never met each other. ADHD can make it harder to remember important things (like saving for your post-work/retirement era). And, if you do remember important things, temporal discounting assures you that because it’s not happening right now, it’s not really that important. You can save for retirement next month. Next year. Next decade? Sometime soon. Ish.

Now, let’s talk about what to do differently if this is you.

Changing Your Relationship with Money

The emotions around money are a big deal – and a great place to start changing your relationship with money. What emotions come up within you when you think about your money? (This isn’t rhetorical – answer the question.) 

Whatever emotions that just came to your mind, they’re valid. They happen. They’re there. But let’s think of them as temporary houseguests. They may have to be tolerated for a while, but they don’t get to redecorate the room.

Techniques to Manage Money-Related Emotions

What do you need to get through your money-related emotions when they visit you? I have a few techniques to suggest:

• Name Your Physical Cues

Call out your physiological changes and what emotions they might be connected to. “Phew, I am suddenly feeling so scatterbrained, and my watch just told me my heart rate is too high. I must be feeling some anxiety.”

• Tame Your Breathing

Take a slow, deep breath, count to four, and let it out slowly. Repeat. If you can do this for 60 seconds, it’s even better.

• Talk to Your Feelings

Personify your emotions, assume positive intention, and talk to them (out loud). “Thanks, Anxiety. I know you’re always trying to look out for me. You don’t want me to feel bad or for anything bad to happen to me. But – I’ve got to do this. You can hang out and wait while I work.”

• Make it Small

Set a timer before you engage with your money, then stick to the timer. Start with small increments of time (5 minutes, 10 minutes, etc.) to allow yourself to build up emotional tolerance.

• Soothe Your Senses

Engage in something sensory during and/or after engaging with your money. Hot cocoa, a warm blanket, a walk on a sunny day, some great memes – something that feels safe, kind, and positive.

• Grab a Partner

Ask a friend to body-double you as you look at your finances. They don’t have to do it with you – just be with you. 

Build an ADHD Financial Planning System that Sticks

The actual management of money is also key. Most of us have tried various unsuccessful ways to handle money. Before you spend hours customizing another approach that will be abandoned a few weeks later, I suggest you spend time considering how you think and work. (Measure twice, cut once.)

I like to share with my clients a framework for evaluating whether a money management system will work for them. There are five categories – and each category may be more (or less) important to you personally:

• Streamlined – Easy to use and integrate into your life

• Accessible – Easy to access your information on the fly 

• Visual – Uses tools like graphs and pictures 

• Engaging – Keeps the process interesting, positive, or rewarding 

• Realistic – Based on your real life, not your aspirational life

Choosing the Right Budgeting Tools

Take a minute to estimate how important each category is to you. Some people use a rating system. For example, “Streamlined” is a 5/5 for me (absolutely essential), while “Engaging” would be 1/5 (mehhhh). Some other people will rank the categories in order of importance to them. Then, bring your list with you as you peruse the current offerings of budgeting systems and apps available. Does it meet your unique needs? Score at least 2 options – but no more than 6 – before choosing one. 

Putting it all together: ADHD Money Management Isn’t About Perfection

Managing money with ADHD isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Just as sunlight gently lifts stains without shredding fabric, facing financial stress with honesty and self-compassion can clear the chaos without burning you out. 

Start small: Name the emotions, tweak your tools, and lean into strategies that honor your brain’s wiring. Whether it’s a five-minute money check-in or a budgeting app that feels like a game, every step forward is a victory. 

Remember, you’re not “broken” for struggling—you’re human, navigating a world not designed for ADHD brains. So let the sunshine in. Air out the stink, celebrate the tiny wins, and trust that even imperfect progress adds up. Your financial peace is worth the light. 🌟

Dr. Christine Hargrove is a couple and family therapist, financial therapist, coach, consultant, and researcher dedicated to promoting emotional, relational, and financial well-being. You can connect with her online at www.drchristinehargrove.com. 

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Navigating Optimal Stimulation for a Balanced Brain 🧠🎢

Let’s talk about something we all secretly crave (and occasionally dread): stimulation.

Imagine your brain as a Goldilocks of focus—constantly seeking that “just right” zone where everything clicks. 

Too little? Cue existential boredom.

Too much? Hello, overwhelm tornado. 

Enter Optimal Stimulation Theory (OST)—the theoretical fairy godmother here to explain why ADHD brains aren’t “broken,” just precision-engineered. Think of OST as your brain’s “Goldilocks Zone”: that magical sliver of arousal where focus hums, creativity sparks, and time melts away (in a good way).

Let’s explore:

What is Optimal Stimulation Theory?

Optimal Stimulation Theory (OST) suggests that every brain has a “sweet spot” of arousal where focus, mood, and productivity align. For ADHD brains, though, this zone is narrower and trickier to hit. Think of it like tuning a radio: neurotypical brains have a wide dial, while an ADHD brain requires just right precision to avoid static. 

Why? 

Blame dopamine (or the lack thereof). ADHD brains are dopamine-hungry.  This means they’re wired to need more stimulation to give them that sweet chemical boost that gets them going.  BUT because they also tend to have a filterless processing style that lets all of that stimulation hit its system at full force?  Well, it means that the hunt for dopamine can turn pretty ugly, pretty darn quick.

What does that mean?  

The Narrow Zone. Well, it means it can take a lot of stimulation to get our brain to its happy place.  But when you’ve got all that stimulation flowing- well, it doesn’t take much to tip over into full-on overload.

But when we nail that Goldilocks Zone of Optimal Stimulation? Hyperfocus ignites, productivity soars, and suddenly, it’s like we’ve unlocked cheat codes to our own quirky operating system.

So, let’s explore the 3 different zones of ADHD stimulation:

ADHD Under-Stimulation: When Boredom Hurts 😩

Let’s get real: For ADHD brains, boredom isn’t just “meh”—it’s painful. Research shows it’s wired to feel under stimulation more intensely, like a fire alarm blaring when the world goes quiet. 

Here’s the lowdown on why:

• Brain Freeze:  ADHD brains are like high-performance engines idling in neutral—they struggle to process low-stimulation inputs (1). 

This means that in boring, low-stimulation settings, our attention drifts faster than a lost balloon 🎈(2). It’s not laziness—it’s your neural wiring screaming, “Give me something to work with!”

• The Understimulation Cycle: Studies reveal a vicious cycle: Boredom can trigger emotional overwhelm and which then impairs how well our brains function, making getting motivated and involved enough to get into the optimal stimulation zone even harder (3). It’s like your brain’s panic button gets stuck on “ABORT MISSION.”

• Emotional Rollercoaster: Boredom cranks up emotional dysregulation. Kids and adults with ADHD often spiral into frustration or irritability during dull tasks (4). It’s like your brain’s shouting, “Fix this snoozefest, or I’ll riot!” 

Signs and Symptoms of an Under-Stimulated ADHD Brain:

• Restlessness or fidgeting

• A drive or impulse to make noise, move around, or otherwise increase sensory input (rubbing your sweater or clicking your pen)

• Impulsive decisions (I’m looking at you: midnight online shopping)

• Mentally checking out during mundane tasks

• Moodiness, frustration, or anger

• Seeking out stimulation- even if it’s negative (think: poking your little brother during a boring grown-up talk at dinner)

ADHD Over-Stimulation: When the Brain Says “NOPE” 🚨

On the other side of optimal stimulation is an equally painful quagmire: Overstimulation.

Imagine your brain is a sponge—except instead of water, it’s soaking up every flickering light, buzzing conversation, task list item, and TikTok transition all at once. Research shows ADHD brains are like hyper-sensitive antennas, picking up way more signals than they can process (5). Here’s what happens when the dial cranks too high:

The Overstimulation Domino Effect

1. Sensory Tsunami:  We all love our fast-paced media, in part for its stimulation (we’re looking at you, YouTube shorts!), but research shows that it bombards ADHD brains with rapid scene changes and flashing lights which is linked to worse focus and more impulsive behavior (6). Think of it like a teenage kegger at Mom’s house- a ton of fun to start, but oh, what a mess to clean up.

2. Cognitive Overload: ADHD brains tend to have less working memory bandwidth (7). Add too much stimulation? It’s like running 100 browser tabs at once—everything freezes. Tasks that feel easy for others (e.g., listening in a noisy room) become mental marathons. 

3. Emotional Fireworks: Overstimulation doesn’t just fry focus—it lights the fuse for emotional meltdowns. Ever gone from “I’m fine” to “I WILL BURN THIS PLACE DOWN” because the AC won’t stop humming? That’s your amygdala (the brain’s panic button) getting hijacked (8). 

Why Overstimulation Feels Like a Trap

ADHD brains aren’t just distracted by overstimulation—they get stuck in it. Research shows:

• The Distraction Cycle: High-stimulation environments (think: crowded classrooms, busy offices) drain mental fuel, making it harder to switch tasks or think clearly (7).

• Emotional Spillover: Overstimulation can crank up impulsivity, leading to “I regret everything” moments (5).

Signs You’re Over-Stimulated:

• Irritability or emotional flooding

• Paralysis by mental clutter

• Brain fog

• Sensory Mutiny (suddenly everything is too much)

• Feeling mentally checked out

• Headaches, nausea, shaky hands, sweating, heart racing

• A sudden need to flee

• Social withdrawal

The Zone of Optimal Stimulation: Where ADHD Brains Thrive

The Zone of Optimal Stimulation (ZOS) can feel like magic for ADHD brains.  It’s the delicious sweet spot where focus ignites, distractions fade, and productivity feels effortless (or at least a whole lot less effortful). 

What Does the Zone of Optimal Stimulation Feel Like? 

When you’re in the zone, it’s like your brain shifts into autopilot (the good kind!).

Here’s the vibe:

• Flow State Feels: Time melts away. You might hyperfocus on a project, chat passionately about a hobby, or crush a task that usually feels like climbing Everest.

• Calm in the Chaos: Your thoughts aren’t racing—they’re aligned. It’s the difference between static noise and a crystal-clear radio signal.

• Dopamine Delight: Tasks feel rewarding, not draining (Halleluluh for the spreadsheet deep-dive!)

Real-Life ZOS Moments (You’ve Probably Been Here)

• The Creative Burst: Writing a story, painting, or coding until 3 a.m. because your brain is on fire.

• The Mundane Masterpiece: Organizing your entire spice rack alphabetically while binging your favorite podcast—and loving it.

• The Social Groove: Chatting with a friend about a shared obsession and feeling totally in sync.

How to Hack Your ZOS 🛠️

Finding your “zone” can feel like finding the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, right? One day, it’s there; the next, it’s not. 

But here’s the secret—it’s not just random magic (even though it totally feels that way sometimes!). The truth is, slipping into that sweet spot often comes down to a mix of little things adding up. Maybe it’s the project you’re that into, or maybe it’s the stars aligning: you slept like a rock, your coffee hit just right, and your playlist is firing on all cylinders.

Sure, it seems unpredictable—like there’s no exact formula. But that’s actually the best part! 

Instead of chasing a one-size-fits-all solution, you get to experiment. Think of it like tuning a radio: sometimes you turn up the dial on energizing factors (hello, upbeat music, or a perfectly timed latte), and other times you dial down the noise (goodbye, distractions, or sensory stimuli. The more you play with these “ingredients,” the easier it becomes to nudge yourself into the ZOS—when you need it.

So yes, the zone might feel elusive, but it’s not out of your control. It’s a puzzle waiting for you to crack it.

Want some puzzle-hacking ideas?  Try these tips to turn your dial up or down:

5 Brain Stimulators to “Turn Up the Dial” (for when you can’t get out of the doldrums)

1. Match Tasks to Your Stimulation Needs: Pair boring chores with upbeat music, podcast, or call with a friend.

2. Fidget Smartly: Use tactile tools (stress balls, doodling) to gently boost stimulation.

3. Science Meets Sound: Your Activation Secret Weapon
   Imagine music designed by neuroscience for your brain—where rhythmic precision and artistry collide to unlock laser focus. That’s engineered focus music: a blend of beats tuned to brainwaves and creative soundscapes that feel more like a vibe than a tool.

   For ADHD brains, apps like Brain.fm (try it here) refine this balance, using science to quiet chaos and art to keep you engaged. No pushy formulas, just a smarter way to harmonize your focus.

4. Add movement to the mix: Treadmill desks, standing desks, under-desk bikes, and movement-based chairs like stability balls are great for adding in more stimulation.

5. Embrace Hyperfocus: Sometimes, it’s knowing that you don’t have enough time to really “get in the zone” that keeps us in the land of under-stimulation- afraid to dive in just to be pulled out again.  Deep focus/ ZOS time blocks are great to get your brain flowing on passion projects (just be sure to set a “re-entry” alarm).

7 Ways to Turn Down the Volume on Overstimulation

1. Soft Lighting Squad 💡
   Ditch harsh fluorescents and flickering lights. Opt for warm lamps, candles (battery-operated if you’re fire-averse!), or natural sunlight.

2. Noise Ninja Moves 🔇
   Pop in noise-canceling headphones, play ambient sounds (like rain or ocean waves), Brain.FM is a great option here as well- they have music scientifically engineered to crank that volume down on your brain waves.

3. Embrace Cozy Vibes 🧸
   Swap scratchy fabrics for loose, comfy clothes, snuggle under a weighted blanket, or fidget with something soothing (hello, stress ball or velvet pillow).

4. Deep Pressure Magic 🤗
   Try bear hugs, gentle wall pushes, or yoga stretches—anything that gives your muscles a “just right” squeeze to ground you.

5. Slow-Mo Movement Mode 🐢
   Rock in a chair, sway side-to-side, or take a leisurely walk. Keep motions smooth and predictable—no sudden spins!

6. Curate Your Environment: Reduce clutter, add calming lighting, or use noise-canceling headphones.

7. Mindfulness Lite: Try 2-minute breathing breaks to reset during overstimulation.

The Takeaway: Your Brain’s “Just Right” is Worth Fighting For

The ZOS isn’t a fantasy—it’s your ADHD brain’s natural state when it gets the stimulation it needs. It’s where creativity thrives, focus flows, and tasks feel less like battles and more like adventures. So experiment, tweak, and celebrate those golden moments when everything clicks.

Pro Tip: When you find your zone, ride that wave—but set a timer. Even ZOS surfers need snacks and bathroom breaks.

• Resources:

  1. Godefroid, E., & Wiersema, J. R. (2017). Impaired processing of task-irrelevant salient information in adults with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: Evidence from event-related potentials. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 126(1), 52–62. https://doi.org/10.1037/abn0000221

  2. Bozhilova, N., Kuntsi, J., Rubia, K., Asherson, P., & Michelini, G. (2022). Event-related brain dynamics during mind wandering in attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: An experience-sampling approach. NeuroImage: Clinical, 35, 103068. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.nicl.2022.103068

  3. Edel, M.-A., Edel, S., Krüger, M., Assion, H.-J., Juckel, G., & Brüne, M. (2015). Attachment, recalled parental rearing, and ADHD symptoms predict emotion processing and alexithymia in adults with ADHD. Annals of General Psychiatry, 14(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/s12991-015-0082-y

  4. Rosen, P. J., Walerius, D. M., Fogleman, N. D., & Factor, P. I. (2015). The association of emotional lability and emotional and behavioral difficulties among children with and without ADHD. ADHD Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorders, 7(4), 281–294. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12402-015-0175-0

  5. Bora, E., & Pantelis, C. (2015). Meta-analysis of social cognition in attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD): comparison with healthy controls and autistic spectrum disorder. Psychological Medicine, 46(4), 699–716. https://doi.org/10.1017/s0033291715002573

  6. Männikkö, N., Ruotsalainen, H., Miettunen, J., & Kääriäinen, M. (2020). Associations between Childhood and Adolescent Emotional and Behavioral Characteristics and Screen Time of Adolescents. Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 41(8), 700–712. https://doi.org/10.1080/01612840.2020.1725195

  7. Fisher, J. T., Hopp, F. R., & Weber, R. (2023). Cognitive and perceptual load have opposing effects on brain network efficiency and behavioral variability in ADHD. Network Neuroscience, 7(4), 1483–1496. https://doi.org/10.1162/netn_a_00336

  8. Roy, A., Hechtman, L., Arnold, L. E., Sibley, M. H., Molina, B. S. G., Swanson, J. M., Howard, A. L., Vitiello, B., Severe, J. B., Jensen, P. S., Arnold, L. E., Hoagwood, K., Richters, J., Vereen, D., Hinshaw, S. P., Elliott, G. R., Wells, K. C., Epstein, J. N., Murray, D. W., & Conners, C. K. (2016). Childhood Factors Affecting Persistence and Desistence of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder Symptoms in Adulthood: Results From the MTA. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 55(11), 937-944.e4. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaac.2016.05.027

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Boost Focus, Joy, and Calm (Without the Patchouli)

Mindfulness has been found to boost focus, impulse control, and stress resilience. For those with ADHD, who might initially find traditional meditation daunting, there are a variety of tailored strategies to integrate mindfulness into their vibrant lifestyles. These adaptable approaches demonstrate that mindfulness is not just a calming exercise but a powerful tool for enhancing mental clarity and emotional regulation, making it an essential ally for ADHD brains seeking empowerment and balance.

Ever wonder why everyone from therapists to TikTok gurus keeps raving about mindfulness for ADHD brains? No, it’s not because we’re all secretly hoarding zen gardens and Himalayan singing bowls (though if you’ve got one, no judgment). It’s because the science behind mindfulness isn’t just compelling—it’s revolutionary for an ADHD brain.

Why ADHD Brains and Mindfulness Are Secret BFFs

So let’s be real: On paper, mindfulness sounds about as ADHD-friendly as a silent retreat. 

“Sit still and watch your thoughts?” 

Cue the internal eye roll. How does staring at your breath help when your brain’s already sprinting through 47 tabs, three existential crises, and a sudden urge to Google “do octopuses have kidneys?”

Glad you’re skeptical. Let’s cut through the hype and unpack four rock-solid, research-backed ways mindfulness actually works for ADHD brains. Spoiler: It’s less about “om” and more about upgrading your mental OS. 

Ready to geek out on brain science (without the jargon)? Let’s dive in.

1. The ADHD Brain’s CEO Gets a Promotion

The Science:
Your prefrontal cortex (PFC)—the CEO of your brain—orchestrates planning, impulse control, and emotional regulation. In ADHD brains, the PFC often feels like a smartphone at 5% battery. But mindfulness? It’s a wireless charger. Research shows mindfulness improves executive function, helping ADHD brains manage tasks and emotions more effectively (Mitchell et al., 2013).

How It Works:

• Impulse Control Upgrade: Mindfulness builds self-awareness, creating a gap between stimulus (“I’m angry!”) and response (“…but I won’t send that passive-aggressive text”). Research shows reduced impulsivity in ADHD adults after mindfulness programs (Zylowska et al., 2008).

• Emotional Hack: By activating the PFC, mindfulness helps you respond to frustration like a Zen master, not a TikTok rant (or at least less ranty)

ADHD Translation: Fewer cringe-worthy texts sent. More “I handled that meltdown like a pro” moments.

2. Growing Gray Matter: Your Brain’s Glow-Up

The Science:
Mindfulness doesn’t just tune up your brain—it remodels it. Studies reveal increased gray matter in the anterior cingulate cortex (ACC) after meditation, a region tied to attention and emotional regulation (Hölzel et al., 2011). For ADHD brains, this means:

• Sharper Focus: A beefed-up ACC may help you catch distractions faster (“Wait, why am I researching llama diets instead of working?”).

• Stress Armor: More gray matter = fewer meltdowns over misplaced keys or overflowing inboxes.

ADHD Translation: Lost your phone? Instead of spiraling, you’ll shrug and retrace your steps like a detective.

3. Focus Boot Camp: Train Your Attention Muscle

The Science:
ADHD attention often feels like herding cats. Mindfulness turns that chaos into focus training:

• Spot the Drift: Notice when your mind wanders (“Oops, I’m planning dinner instead of listening”) and gently refocus. This strengthens attention networks (Jha et al., 2007).

• Boredom Bench Press: Sitting through discomfort (“This meeting is endless”) builds tolerance for tedious tasks. Mindfulness even improves task persistence (Knouse et al., 2017).

ADHD Translation: Finish a work project without falling down a 2-hour YouTube rabbit hole.

4. Rewiring Reactions: From Impulsive to Intentional

The Science:
ADHD brains often chase dopamine to escape discomfort (cough, doomscrolling, cough). Mindfulness flips this script by teaching you to “sit with it”:

• Break the Avoidance Cycle: Instead of fleeing boredom or stress, mindfulness helps you face it head-on, reducing emotional reactivity (Semple et al., 2010).

• Rewrite Default Settings: Observing discomfort (“I’m overwhelmed”) without acting weakens impulsive reactions over time.

ADHD Translation: More Skip the midnight Amazon spree- Opt for a walk or a nap instead.

5. Mindfulness Hacks for ADHD: No Cushion Required

Ok.  So we know.  It’s really good for us.  But how in the world do we do it when the idea of sitting still and “thought-watching” sounds as appealing as driving screws into our nails!  

Well- guess what?  It doesn’t have to be torture! In fact, there are some real tricks to making Mindfulness and other Meditations actually work for an ADHD brain (and its often wriggly body)

1. Snack-Sized Mindfulness

Forget marathon sessions—ADHD brains thrive on micro-moments. Try the 20 Breaths Technique: Count 20 breaths while noticing the air moving through your nostrils. Done waiting for coffee? Boom—mental reset. Studies show even brief practices slash stress (Lutz et al., 2008).

2. Move It (Seriously, Get Wiggly)

Walking meditation = mindfulness for antsy legs. Feel each footstep, or try “yoga for people who hate yoga” (child’s pose counts!). A 2017 study found that movement-based mindfulness (like yoga) boost emotional regulation in ADHD brains (Mitchell et al., 2017).

3. Sensory Shenanigans

Turn mundane moments into mindfulness:

• Sniff that coffee like it’s a $100 perfume.

• Notice the hum of your AC or the texture of your hoodie.

Engaging your senses anchors you now—not in yesterday’s awkward email.

4. Gratitude Groove

Jot one tiny win daily: “I remembered to hydrate!” or “My plant is still alive!” Gratitude rewires your brain for positivity, cutting through ADHD shame spirals (Sauer-Zavala et al., 2013).

5. Guided Meditation Apps: ADHD Edition

Calm and Inflow ADHD offer bite-sized sessions (even for skeptics). 

Pro tip: ADHDer himself, Jeff Warren’s 30-Day Mindfulness for Beginners on the Calm app is like mindfulness with training wheels—zero judgment, all vibes.

6. Build a Mindfulness Nook

Claim a corner with a cozy blanket, fairy lights, or a “do not disturb” sign. This signals your brain: “Chill mode: activated.”

7. Reminders That Don’t Annoy

Set quirky phone alerts: “Pause. Breathe. Pretend you’re a sloth.” Tie mindfulness to existing habits—like after brushing your teeth or during lunch breaks.

8. Gamify Your Practice

Apps like Finch turn mindfulness into a quest. Rescue a virtual pet by logging mindful minutes—dopamine + calm = ADHD win.

Your Turn: Rewrite the Rules

Mindfulness isn’t a cure-all, but it’s a tool—one that bends to your rhythm. Hate sitting still? Dance. Forget to practice? Use reminders. The power of mindfulness lies in flexibility, not perfection.

So, ADHD fam, let’s flip the script. Share your wins (or fails!) below. Did sniffing a cinnamon bagel count as mindfulness? Heck yes. 🌟

• References:

  1. Chiesa, A., Calati, R., & Serretti, A. (2011). Does mindfulness training improve cognitive abilities? A systematic review of neuropsychological findings. Clinical Psychology Review, 31(3), 449–464. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2010.11.003

  2. Cairncross, M., & Miller, C. J. (2020). The Effectiveness of Mindfulness-Based Therapies for ADHD: A Meta-Analytic Review. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(5), 627-643. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054715625301

  3. Hölzel, B. K., Carmody, J., Vangel, M., Congleton, C., Yerramsetti, S. M., Gard, T., & Lazar, S. W. (2011). Mindfulness practice leads to increases in regional brain gray matter density. Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging, 191(1), 36–43. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.pscychresns.2010.08.006

  4. Jha, A. P., Krompinger, J., & Baime, M. J. (2007). Mindfulness training modifies subsystems of attention. Cognitive, Affective, & Behavioral Neuroscience, 7(2), 109–119. https://doi.org/10.3758/cabn.7.2.109

  5. Lutz, A., Brefczynski-Lewis, J., Johnstone, T., & Davidson, R. J. (2008). Regulation of the neural circuitry of emotion by compassion meditation: Effects of meditative expertise. PLOS ONE, 3(3), e1897. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0001897

  6. Mitchell, J. T., McIntyre, E., English, J. S., Dennis, M. F., Beckham, J. C., & Kollins, S. H. (2013). A pilot trial of mindfulness meditation training for adhd in adulthood: impact on core symptoms, executive functioning, and emotion dysregulation. Journal of Attention Disorders, 21(13), 1105-1120. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054713513328

  7. Mrazek, M. D., Franklin, M. S., Phillips, D. T., Baird, B., & Schooler, J. W. (2013). Mindfulness training improves working memory capacity and GRE performance while reducing mind wandering. Psychological Science, 24(5), 776–781. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797612459659

  8. Sauer-Zavala, S.E., Walsh, E.C., Eisenlohr-Moul, T.A. et al. (2013) Comparing Mindfulness-Based Intervention Strategies: Differential Effects of Sitting Meditation, Body Scan, and Mindful Yoga. Mindfulness 4, 383–388 (2013). https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-012-0139-9

  9. Semple, R. J., Lee, J., Rosa, D., & Miller, L. F. (2010). A randomized trial of mindfulness-based cognitive therapy for children: Promoting mindful attention to enhance social-emotional resiliency in children. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 19(2), 218–229. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-009-9301-y

  10. Zylowska, L., Ackerman, D. L., Yang, M. H., Futrell, J. L., Horton, N. L., Hale, T. S., Pataki, C., & Smalley, S. L. (2008). Mindfulness meditation training in adults and adolescents with ADHD. Journal of Attention Disorders, 11(6), 737–746. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054707308502

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

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Hypersensitivity, Sensory Sensitivity and the ADHD Experience [2025 update]

ADHD brains are wired to experience the world with extraordinary intensity—sounds, textures, and emotions flood in without a filter, turning everyday stimuli into a constant stream of "too much." While this hypersensitivity can be painful, it’s not a flaw- it’s part of your brain’s unique wiring, fueling creativity, empathy, and a knack for noticing details others miss. While you can’t switch off this heightened awareness, you can soften its edges with targeted strategies and environment tweaks. Let’s explore how to honor your sensitivity, protect your peace, and thrive in your rhythm. 🌟

If you’ve ever wondered why your ADHD brain feels like it’s hosting a never-ending sensory parade—honking cars, scratchy sweater tags, and flickering lights included—you’re not imagining things.

While ADHD hypersensitivity is real and often painful, it’s also neurobiological and far from a “flaw.” It’s your brain’s unique wiring, dialing up the volume on sensations and emotions that others barely notice.

While all these sensations and emotions can be painful (it’s also part of what makes you creative, intuitive, and deeply empathetic!), you can learn to thrive with it.

Let’s unpack why ADHD brains are sensory sponges—and how to reclaim calm in a world that often feels “too much.”

What are Hypersensitivity, HSP or Sensory Sensitivity?

Hypersensitivity, also known as hyperempathy syndrome, HSP (highly sensitive person), and sensory sensitivity, isn't "being too sensitive" – it's a real deal neurobiological thing.

People with ADHD brains often experience the world in a more intense way, both physically and emotionally. This can lead to strong reactions like frustration, overwhelm, and even physical symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, and even rashes.

All too often, people with hypersensitivity are made to feel crazy. They are told, “You’re too sensitive” or “You need to toughen up.” But the sensitivity that the ADHD brain experiences isn’t the result of a character flaw- you can't be toughened out of it. It's a neurobiologically based symptom. In fact, research suggests that the entire system of people with hypersensitivity is extra sensitive, making them more prone to biological sensitivities like asthma and allergies.

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ADHD hypersensitivity/ HSP/ Sensory Sensitivity symptoms:

Hypersensitive ADHD brains are more likely to get flooded and extremely bothered by:

• Loud, sudden noises

• Bright or flashing lights

• Fast objects

• Strong odors

• Too much information

• Coarse fabric or tags

• Clothing that's too tight

• Hair rubbing against skin

• Too many people (can cause claustrophobia)

• Strong feelings (their own or other people’s)

• Minor disagreements or frustrations

• Tactile sensitivity

When the ADHD and HSP brain is flooded by these sensations, they are likely to feel overwhelming feelings of:

• Rage

• Frustration

• Despair

• A desire to flee or hide

• Crying

• Anxiety

• Physical symptoms like rashes, GI distress and headaches

Why ADHD Brains are Wired for Sensory Overload

You know those foot-in-the-mouth, accidental honesty-bomb moments? Like telling Aunt Mildred her prized sweater looks suspiciously like a clown threw up rainbows (whoops!). Or politely inquiring if your cousin was expecting... only to discover it was just a burrito baby bump (awkward!).

We can chalk many of those moments up to a “lack of filter.” And it’s easy to see that lack of filter in things coming out of the ADHD brain—the interruptions, the sudden outbursts, and the awkward jokes.  

ADHD, Hypersensitivity and Sensory Sensitivity: What the Research Says

In spite of the fact that hypersensitivity abounds among ADHD brains, there is very little research on the topic. The research that does exist, however, agrees on several fronts.

ADHD brains are more likely to be BOTH hypo and hypersensitive

Yup, you read that right. Like so most things related to ADHD brains- they tend to fall to the extremes. So, ADHD brains are more likely to be either more sensitive or less sensitive to external stimuli than neurotypical brains. (1,2,3)

Women with ADHD are more likely than men with ADHD to be hyper/hypersensitive

Much more likely, actually. One research study found that 44% of women with ADHD and only 24% of men with ADHD reported hyper/hyposensitivity. (2)

The more ADHD your brain, the more sensitive it is

Just like ADHD, hypersensitivity exists on a spectrum. Research suggests that those spectrums seem linked- so the more significant your ADHD differences, the more significant your sensitivity will likely be, too. (1)

Emotional Sensitivities and ADHD

ADHD emotions are often stronger, more sudden, and more overwhelming. These heightened emotions then flood and overwhelm the ADHD brain, often causing people to act out in rash and seemingly irrational ways. But, when you look at what's really happening- it makes a lot more sense.

A system under siege:

Because the ADHD brain doesn’t have a filter for information, it's under constant siege from all the information, sensations, and environmental stimuli it receives.

This onslaught causes our body’s sympathetic nervous system, its fight or flight alarm system, to be on high alert- ready to help us fight off an attack, flee as fast as possible, or freeze with the hope that an assailant passes us by.

This type of preparation, though, leaves us interpreting the world as though it is poised to hurt us. So, any comment, any passing look, or any missed remark is more likely to be read as something intended to wound rather than accidental or unrelated.

An Emotional Sponge:

It’s not just sensory informantion that ADHD brain’s don’t filter. They also keep the floodgates open wide for emotions! That's right, ADHD brains are like human empathy sponges, picking up on every subtle change in someone's expression, every nervous twitch, and every sigh.

The upside? ADHD brains can be incredible emotional detectives, often reading people like open books before they even utter a word. Our down-to-earth friend feeling a little down? We got it. Our boss secretly stressed about that presentation? We can feel it!

But here's the rub: this superpower can also be a double-edged sword. Not only do we experience our own intense emotions, but we also soak up the feelings of everyone around us. It's like being an emotional sponge, constantly absorbing the joys and sorrows of others. While it fosters empathy, it can also be downright draining!

Zero to Sixty in an Instant:

The lack of filter that overwhelms the ADHD brain with sensations and other people’s feelings also struggles to filter internal emotions. So, when an ADHD brain feels a feeling, it feels it on full blast. ADHD brains tend not to regulate emotion (just like they don’t regulate attention or action either)- they either feel them entirely or not at all. It’s an on/off switch instead of a dimmer switch. So there is not just a little anger-- the system goes from “I’m fine” to full rage in an instant. Now, combine this with a system under siege, and the emotional issues with ADHD start to make more sense.

ADHD and Physical Sensitivities:

The lack of a filter in the ADHD brain means that it can’t adapt to sensations. So, rather than feeling that itchy tag in a shirt for a moment and then saying, “That’s not important,”- the ADHD brain never stops noticing the tag. All day long, it's trying to pay attention to the important things: your professor’s lecture, your wife’s grocery list, your boss’s most recent request. But that tag keeps coming back into awareness, and your focus has to ping pong- back and forth between the task at hand and the itch at the back of your neck.

The lack of filter in the ADHD brain goes for physical sensations too! Unlike a neurotypical brain that might say "meh, itchy tag" and move on, ADHD brains are like faulty smoke detectors – constantly blaring the alarm. Imagine trying to focus on a lecture or remember your wife’s grocery list while an itchy gremlin is having a rave on your back! Your brain desperately tries to ping-pong between that all-important thing you’re supposed to remember and the epic battle happening in your shirt.

But it's not just the constant awareness. It's the intensity. That scratchy sweater or the neighbor's barking dog or the flashing lights don't hit the ADHD nervous system like a minor annoyance – they storm in like sensory invasions! Here's where the ADHD brain's regulation issues come in again. We don't just experience the sensations; we get flooded by them. A light breeze feels like a hurricane, and a flickering light becomes a strobe show in a room of mirrors.

It's no wonder staying focused feels like an Olympic feat- our brains are constantly bombarded by a sensory assault course!

Can ADHD brains be cured of high sensitivity?

There's no specific treatment for hypersensitivity, and there isn’t anything that is going to make an ADHD brain no longer hypersensitive. And honestly, as painful as that is (and it is truly painful), there’s also a huge upside to the fact that ADHD hypersensitivity is here to stay.

Becuase the hypersensitivity of an ADHD brain is also part of what makes it intuitive, justice-sensitive, creative, and able to solve problems in novel ways. The fact that ADHD brains can’t filter out extraneous information is part of why it’s able to make connections that other types of brains can’t, and the fact that it doesn’t skip over the body language of the person that you’re talking to is part of why you know, intuitively, how they are feeling.

So, no. ADHD brain’s high sensitivity can’t be “cured,” and that’s a good thing. But that doesn’t mean that we can’t reduce its negative impact.

How to Reduce Hypersensitivity with ADHD:

Because hypersensitivity is due, in part, to the ADHD brain’s difficulty with regulation, the 5 regulatory fill-ups (the things that research shows help the ADHD brain regulate) are also helpful in diminishing the impact of hypersensitivity. These include:

• ADHD Medication: While there's no "hypersensitivity potion," ADHD meds act like brain boosters. They help your brain manage how intensely it feels things, both physically and emotionally. Think of it as a volume knob for your senses – turning down the annoying background noise! They also help you focus on what matters, letting you tune out unnecessary distractions.
  

• Exercise: Forget about shedding pounds – exercise is a brain gym for ADHD! Just like medication, it supercharges your brain's ability to regulate. Think of it as a natural happy pill that keeps your brain firing on all cylinders. Want the science behind this awesomeness? Check out this article on exercise and the ADHD brain here.
  

• Meditation: Meditation is like a force field for your ADHD brain. And while it can get a bad rap in the world of ADHD. Research is clear that it helps you chill out faster after sensory overload and gives you a moment of calm before reacting impulsively. Imagine hitting a pause button before things get out of hand. Sound good? Grab the calm app or any other short meditation guide and check it out!
  

• Nutrition: Keeping your body (and therefore brain) well-fed is essential to helping it regulate emotions and sensations. Our brains use up 20% of our blood sugar (which is huge considering it only weighs about 3lbs!), and when it doesn’t have a nice, steady stream of blood sugar, it can’t do that hard work of feeling just a little bit of a feeling or ignoring the car alarm down the street. Need some help in the kitchen to fuel your high octane brain? Check out 9 Helpful Hacks to Cure the Culinary Chaos.
  

• Sleep: A good night's sleep is like a full recharge for your brain's regulation system. Aim for 7-8 hours of quality sleep (not just lying in bed!). When your brain is sleep-deprived, its ability to manage everything takes a hit, making it easier to get overwhelmed. But let’s be honest- that’s all a whole lot easier said than done! Want some help getting the rest your brain deserves? Check out How to Get off the Couch and Into Bed.

Your ADHD Hypersensitivity Survival Guide

Making a stop at the regulation fill-up station will certainly make your brain’s natural hypersensitivity easier to handle. But sometimes, the sensory gremlins won't budge. That's where we call in the cavalry: environmental adjustments, self-awareness, and a hefty dose of self-compassion, which, all together, becomes a surefire recipe for living well with ADHD hypersensitivity.

• Respect the Awesomely Wired Machine:

  Our brains are like tricked-out racecars, not clunky old jalopies. Trying to force them into "normal" mode is a recipe for disaster. Instead, let's celebrate their unique wiring and work with it, not against it. When we can honor what does and doesn’t work for them and work to accommodate that rather than fight it- that’s where we have our true power.
  

• Escape Pods at the Ready:

  Even with the best routine, sensory overload can strike. No shame in that game! Give yourself permission to hit the eject button and retreat. Taking a time-out from overstimulation lets your nervous system recharge so you can get back to the matter at hand with a clear head.
  

• Mute the Mayhem:

  Sometimes, the best defense is a good offense (against sensory overload, that is). So go ahead, block that stimulation with noise-canceling headphones, blue light-blocking glasses, or sitting in a corner or tagless clothing- your nervous system will thank you with high fives all around (or at least a bit more chill to your vibe).
  

• Boundaries: Your Personal Force Field:

  Once you know your kryptonite (ahem, sensory triggers), set up boundaries to protect your inner peace. Friend with a house full of rambunctious toddlers? Suggest a park playdate instead. Concerts overwhelming? Opt for a cozy coffeehouse jam session. Knowing your brain gives you the chance to erect the boundaries you need to protect it.
  

• Sharing is Caring (and Effective):

  Letting your loved ones know about your sensitivities is like giving them a decoder ring to your brain. Explain how things feel for you (maybe even share this article!). Watch as understanding blossoms and new compromises melt the tension of different needs..
  

• Be the Architect of Your Awesome:

  Giant shopping malls got you feeling claustrophobic? Explore local shops instead. Itchy tags driving you bonkers? Invest in comfy, tagless clothes. Don't let your brain be a punching bag for unnecessary stimulation – creativity is your best friend here. You have the ability to build your life so it works for you and your brain!

Looking for a step-by-step process to handle your emotional sensitivity? Don’t miss the brand new FREE ADDept online masterclass, the 5-step process for developing emotional mastery with an ADHD brain.

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

This online course has been designed specifically to help teach the strategies ADHD brains need to help them move from overwhelm  and meltdowns to confident emotional mastery.

• Resources:

  1. Bijlenga D, Tjon-Ka-Jie JYM, Schuijers F, Kooij JJS. Atypical sensory profiles as core features of adult ADHD, irrespective of autistic symptoms. European Psychiatry. 2017;43:51-57. doi:10.1016/j.eurpsy.2017.02.481

  2. Kamath, M. S., Dahm, C. R., Tucker, J. R., Huang-Pollock, C. L., Etter, N. M., & Neely, K. A. (2020). Sensory profiles in adults with and without ADHD. Research in developmental disabilities, 104, 103696.

  3. Panagiotidi, M., Overton, P. G., & Stafford, T. (2018). The relationship between ADHD traits and sensory sensitivity in the general population. Comprehensive psychiatry, 80, 179-185.

  4. Craig B. H. Surman,Joseph Biederman,Thomas Spencer,Carolyn A. Miller,Katie M. McDermott,andStephenV. Faraone.Understanding deficient emotional self-regulation in adults with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder: a controlledstudy.ADHD Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorders.September 2013,Volume 5,Issue3,pp 273–282.

  5. Lane SJ, Reynolds S. Sensory Over-Responsivity as an Added Dimension in ADHD. Front Integr Neurosci. 2019;13:40. doi:10.3389/fnint.2019.00040

  6. Shaw P, Stringaris A, Nigg J, Leibenluft E. Emotion dysregulation in attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Am J Psychiatry. 2014 Mar;171(3):276-93. doi: 10.1176/appi.ajp.2013.13070966. PMID: 24480998; PMCID: PMC4282137.

  7. Shimizu VT, Bueno OF, Miranda MC. Sensory processing abilities of children with ADHD. Braz J Phys Ther. 2014;18(4):343–352. doi:10.1590/bjpt-rbf.2014.0043

  8. Stern A, Agnew-Blais JC, Danese A, Fisher HL, Matthews T, Polanczyk GV, Wertz J, Arseneault L. Associations between ADHD and emotional problems from childhood to young adulthood: a longitudinal genetically sensitive study. J Child Psychol Psychiatry. 2020 Nov;61(11):1234-1242. doi: 10.1111/jcpp.13217. Epub 2020 Feb 29. PMID: 32112575; PMCID: PMC7483180.

Want to know more about
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Advocating for Accommodations (even if you don’t disclose)

Navigating the workplace with ADHD can feel like an uphill battle, with challenges like distractions, time blindness, and difficulty staying organized often standing in the way of productivity. However, with the right accommodations—whether formal or informal—individuals with ADHD can unlock their unique strengths, such as creativity, hyperfocus, and out-of-the-box thinking.

Navigating ADHD at work can feel like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded—frustrating, overwhelming, and downright exhausting. But every day, I see brilliant ADHD brains just like yours transform their workplace challenges into opportunities for their unique brains to shine.  What’s their secret?  Well, it’s all about harnessing the right ADHD tools and strategies and throwing in a dash of self-advocacy.  

But figuring out which tools and strategies are going to be best for you can feel overwhelming.  So I’ve gathered together the best tools, tricks, strategies, and accommodations I’ve seen work time and time again and grouped them by the challenges they tackle.  So, whether you’re looking to boost focus, manage time, or simply survive an open-plan office, this guide is packed with ADHD tips backed by research and delivered with compassion.

Why Advocate for ADHD-Friendly Adjustments?

Let’s face it—ADHD brains are wired differently, and that’s not a bad thing! Research shows that ADHD is associated with creativity, hyperfocus, and out-of-the-box thinking (White & Shah, 2006)- things that certainly come in handy at work!

But, traditional work environments aren’t always designed to harness these strengths. By advocating for adjustments—whether or not you disclose your ADHD—you can create a workspace that works for you, not against you.

Yup! You heard that right- while you can (and sometimes should) disclose your diagnosis and apply for formal accommodation you can still get what you need without it! 

How?  There’s one simple line that not only can get you what you need but shows your insight, dedication to your work and thoughtfulness all at the same time (pretty cool combo- no?!?) It is:

“I’ve learned over the years that because of the way my brain works, I know I do best with [insert accommodation here].” 

This approach focuses on solutions rather than labels, making it easier to get the support you need. (Not sure whether to disclose your ADHD? Check out our article here for guidance.)

The key is finding the right mix of accommodations that work for you and your job. You don’t need to ask for everything on this list—start with one or two strategies and build from there. 

Let’s dive into the ADHD tools and techniques that can help you thrive at work.

Top ADHD Work Accommodations

Boost Focus and Minimize Distractions

ADHD brains are like sponges for distractions—they soak up everything! But with a few tweaks, you can create a distraction-free zone that lets your focus shine- try these out next Monday:

Quiet Workspaces

Open-plan offices are the kryptonite of ADHD productivity. Research shows that noise and visual distractions can significantly impair focus for individuals with ADHD (Söderlund et al., 2007). If possible, request a quiet workspace or a private area where you can hunker down during high-focus tasks. No private office? The next tip is for you! 

Noise-Canceling Headphones

These magical devices create a bubble of calm in even the noisiest environments. Studies suggest reducing auditory distractions can improve task performance for people with ADHD (Helps et al., 2014). Not only that- but over-the-ear headphones provide a perfect nonverbal signal to the chatty Cathy next to you that it’s time to shhhhh. Pro tip: If you apply for formal accommodations, your workplace may even buy them for you! 

Minimize Interruptions

A simple “Do Not Disturb” sign or a status update on your messaging app can work wonders. Talk with your boss or supervisor about setting expectations about preferred communication methods and set aside dedicated focus time. This small step can make a big difference in maintaining productivity.

Master Time Management and Organization

If your ADHD brain feels like a browser with 47 tabs open, these tools and strategies can help you close a few (or at least organize them).

Clear, Defined Tasks and REAL Concrete Deadlines

One of the biggest challenges for ADHD brains is the lack of time urgency—aka, the “I’ll do it later” syndrome. To combat this, set weekly meetings with your boss where you break projects into smaller, actionable steps with clear deadlines. For example, instead of “Write report,” try:

1. Outline the report structure by Tuesday.

2. Gather data for Section 1 by Thursday.

3. Write the introduction by Friday.

Research shows that breaking tasks into smaller chunks can improve task initiation and completion for ADHD brains (Barkley, 2015). But don’t forget about that part of doing this with your boss.  These deadlines shouldn’t just be self-imposed—ask your boss or supervisor to set them for you. External accountability can be a game-changer for staying on track.

Time Management Tools

There’s an app for that! Tools like Trello, Asana, or a simple calendar can break down overwhelming projects into bite-sized tasks. These tools act as your external brain, keeping track of deadlines and milestones so you don’t have to.  (And yes- this is another expense that your workplace can and should cover for you!)

Flexible Schedules

ADHD brains often have peak productivity times that don’t align with the traditional 9-to-5. If possible, advocate for a flexible schedule that lets you work during your most focused hours. Whether you’re an early bird or a night owl, this adjustment can be a game-changer that allows you to work with your brain- not against it!

Harness Hyperfocus with Deep Work Times

Hyperfocus is one of the ADHD brain’s superpowers—when you’re in the zone, you can accomplish incredible things. But to harness this power, you need uninterrupted time to dive deep into your work.

Schedule Deep Work Blocks

Work with your boss to set aside specific times in your day for deep work—periods where you focus solely on one task without distractions. During these blocks:

• Turn off email notifications.

• Silence your phone.

• Let your team know you’re unavailable.

Research by Cal Newport, author of Deep Work, highlights that uninterrupted focus is essential for high-quality, meaningful work. For ADHD brains, this can also help you tap into hyperfocus and get more done in less time.

Communicate Boundaries

Let your team know about your deep work times and why they’re important. For example:
“I do my best work when I have uninterrupted time to focus. I’ve blocked off 9 AM to 11 AM for deep work, so I won’t be responding to emails or attending meetings during that time.”

This approach sets clear boundaries and lets them know what’s in it for them all without needing to disclose your diagnosis if you don’t want to.

Use a “Do Not Disturb” Signal

Others aren’t going to remember what your deep work times are.  So I know I said it before, but this one bears repeating- simple visual signals like over-the-ear headphones, a sign on your desk, a status update on Slack, or a closed office door, a clear “Do Not Disturb” signal can help protect your deep work time.  You can have some fun with it, too- one creative ADHDer I know wears a crown whenever in deep work mode to tell everyone around him that it’s his focus time.

Harness Hyperactivity and Movement

Feeling like a popcorn kernel ready to pop? It’s hard to focus when your body feels like a 4-year-old on a sugar high.  Incorporating movement into your workday can help channel that restless energy productively.

Short Breaks

Frequent breaks aren’t just a luxury—they’re a necessity for ADHD brains. Research shows that short, active breaks can improve focus and reduce impulsivity (Pontifex et al., 2013).  But the active part is key here- these aren’t scroll-on-your-phone breaks that take you into a rabbit warren of distractions- this is short movement that spends some of the excess energy and tops up your regulatory stores. 

Try the Pomodoro Technique: work for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break to take a lap around the office,  drop to the floor and do 10 pushups or squat your heart out in the stall of the bathroom. 

Stand-Up Desks or Active Seating

Stand-up desks, stability balls, and treadmill desks can be a great way to stay active while working. These options allow you to move without sacrificing productivity, making them ideal for ADHD brains that need to fidget to focus. (And yup! You guessed it!  This is another tool that your workplace can foot the bill for with formal accommodations.

Streamline Communication and Information Processing

ADHD brains can sometimes feel like they’re running on dial-up in a broadband world.  The challenges with working memory (the part of our brain that holds all the things we’re actively thinking about) and processing speed (how fast our brains process information)(Kasper et al., 2018; Shannahan et al. 2016) that the ADHD brain often has can make meetings and trainings feel like trying to drink from a firehose. These strategies can help you stay on top of information without getting overwhelmed.

Record Meetings

Mindwandered and missed an important detail?  Yeah, me too 🙋🏼‍♀️ Recording meetings can act as a backup brain, ensuring you don’t miss a thing. Plus, it’s a great way to revisit key points later.

One-on-One Meetings

Regular check-ins with your supervisor can help clarify expectations and set achievable goals. These meetings provide a focused space for feedback and ensure you’re on the same page.

Make use of Automated Notetakers

Tools like Otter.ai, Fathom, or Microsoft OneNote’s transcription features can capture meeting discussions in real time. This eliminates the pressure of trying to jot down every detail while actively participating, which can be particularly challenging for ADHD brains struggling with working memory.

Leverage Meeting Minutes for Action Item Review:

After meetings, review the automated notes or minutes to extract actionable items. Highlight key tasks, deadlines, and responsibilities. This practice not only reinforces memory but also provides a clear roadmap for follow-up, reducing the risk of missed commitments.

Leverage Technology and Assistive Tools

When your ADHD brain feels like it’s stuck in slow motion, technology help give it a boost- allowing you to harness that unique brain of yours.

Mind Mapping Software

ADHD brains often work more like spider web than a caterpillar marching in a line- throwing ideas out in a shot of connectivity.  Tools like MindMeister or XMind help organize thoughts visually, making complex information easier to understand.  But of course- a piece of paper and some colored pens work great too- either way- finding strategies to get all those ideas out and easier to manage is key.

Text-to-Speech Software

Listening to written text can help catch errors and improve clarity. It’s a great tool for proofreading or reviewing long documents.  It’s also key for getting through long documents without the painful boredom of sitting trying to absorb it all.  Listening to the annual report while you walk the dog, ride your bike or do the dishes can do wonders for your ability to actually absorb the information.

Dictation Software

If you’re like me and you think faster than you type, dictation software can be a lifesaver. It’s like having a personal scribe, speeding up the writing process and reducing frustration.

ADHD Advocacy at Work: Thriving, Not Just Surviving

Advocating for ADHD-friendly adjustments isn’t about asking for special treatment—it’s about creating an environment where you can do your best work. By understanding your needs and communicating them effectively, you can bring the very best your unique brain has to bear. 

Remember, the goal isn’t just to survive the workday—it’s to thrive. With the right ADHD tools, strategies, and a little self-advocacy, you can pave the way for success and fulfillment.

Join the Conversation

What ADHD strategies help you stay productive at work? Have you tried deep work blocks, visual timers, or concrete deadlines? Share your tips and experiences in the comments below!

• References:

  • Albulescu, P., Macsinga, I., Rusu, A., Șulea, C., Bodnaru, A., & Tulbure, B. T. (2022). "give me a break!" a systematic review and meta-analysis on the efficacy of micro-breaks for increasing well-being and performance. Plos One, 17(8), e0272460. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0272460

  • Barkley, R. A. (2015). Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder: A handbook for diagnosis and treatment (4th ed.). Guilford Press.

  • Boot, N., Nevicka, B., & Baas, M. (2017). Creativity in adhd: goal-directed motivation and domain specificity. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(13), 1857-1866. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054717727352

  • Biederman, J., Petty, C. R., Ball, S. W., Fried, R., Doyle, A. E., Cohen, D., … & Faraone, S. V. (2009). Are cognitive deficits in attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder related to the course of the disorder? a prospective controlled follow-up study of grown up boys with persistent and remitting course. Psychiatry Research, 170(2-3), 177-182. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psychres.2008.09.010

  • Cassuto, H., Ben-Simon, A., & Berger, I. (2013). Using environmental distractors in the diagnosis of adhd. Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, 7. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnhum.2013.00805

  • Newport, C. (2016). Deep work: Rules for focused success in a distracted world. Grand Central Publishing.

  • Pontifex, M. B., Saliba, B. J., Raine, L. B., Picchietti, D. L., & Hillman, C. H. (2013). Exercise improves behavioral, neurocognitive, and scholastic performance in children with ADHD. The Journal of Pediatrics, 162(3), 543–551. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpeds.2012.08.036

  • Schippers, L. M., Greven, C. U., & Hoogman, M. (2023). Adhd traits in the general population and their association with positive aspects of adhd. https://doi.org/10.31234/osf.io/dev2c

  • Slobodin, O., Cassuto, H., & Berger, I. (2015). Age-related changes in distractibility: developmental trajectory of sustained attention in adhd. Journal of Attention Disorders, 22(14), 1333-1343. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054715575066

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

This online course has been designed specifically to help teach the strategies ADHD brains need to help them move from overwhelm  and meltdowns to confident emotional mastery.

Want to know more about
thriving with ADHD?

Check out these other articles:

If, When and How to Disclose ADHD to Your Employer and Friends

We’ve all been there: that moment when you debate whether to share your ADHD diagnosis with your employer, your partner, or your friends. Do you risk judgment? Gain support? The answer isn’t simple— and often the decision to share your ADHD diagnosis can feel like a high-stakes game of “Should I or shouldn’t I?” Spoiler alert: there’s no one-size-fits-all answer, but there are ways to navigate this sticky subject with grace, humor, and a little bit of strategy.

So, let’s dive into the world of ADHD advocacy, explore the pros and cons of disclosing ADHD, and figure out how to have those conversations without feeling like you’re jumping off a cliff.

Should You Tell Your Boss About Your ADHD?

Ah, the million-dollar question: To disclose or not to disclose? When it comes to the workplace, this decision can feel like walking a tightrope. On one hand, disclosing your ADHD can open the door to accommodations and understanding. On the other, there’s the very real fear of stigma or being seen as “less capable.”

Let’s break it down:

The Pros of Disclosing ADHD at Work

• Accommodations Galore: Disclosing can lead to adjustments like flexible hours, hybrid work options, or even a quieter workspace that can do wonders for your productivity and general experience at work.

• Understanding and Support: A good employer can work with you to find strategies like deadline reminders, clearer instructions, or project assignments that play to your strengths.

• A More ADHD-Friendly Environment: Being open can foster a culture of empathy and support, not just for you but for others who might be struggling in silence.

The Cons of Disclosing ADHD at Work

• Risk of Bias: Unfortunately, not everyone “gets” ADHD. You might encounter misconceptions or even discrimination (though laws like the ADA are supposed to be there to protect you).

• Overemphasis on Challenges: Some employers might focus more on what you can’t do rather than what you can.

• Privacy Leaks (Even If They’re Not Supposed To): While employers are legally required to keep your diagnosis confidential, there’s always a chance your disclosure could unintentionally spread—whether through office gossip or a well-meaning (but chatty) HR rep. Once it’s out there, you can’t take it back.

• The Learning Curve Crunch: If you’re fresh to the ADHD journey, you might still be figuring out your own needs and accommodations. Disclosing before you’re ready could leave you scrambling to educate your employer and yourself at the same time—like trying to assemble IKEA furniture without the instructions.

• Accommodation Advocacy Fatigue: Even with good intentions, some workplaces might expect you to lead the charge in problem-solving accommodations, which can feel overwhelming if you’re already juggling ADHD-related challenges.

Know Your Rights (Because Knowledge is Power!)

If you decide to disclose, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) has your back in the U.S. Here’s what you’re entitled to:

• Reasonable Accommodations: Think flexible hours, noise-canceling headphones, or a desk away from the office chatterbox.

• Zero Discrimination: Your boss can’t fire, demote, or side-eye you for your ADHD. Retaliation? Also, a no-go.

• Privacy: Your diagnosis stays between you, HR, and whoever needs to know to make accommodations happen.

  
  

Pro Tip: Check your state’s laws too! Places like California and New York offer extra protections.

The Middle-Ground Approach

If full disclosure feels too risky, you can still advocate for your needs without mentioning ADHD. For example:

• “I work best with clear, written instructions and minimal interruptions.”

• “Regular check-ins help me stay on track and deliver my best work.”

This way, you’re asking for what you need without diving into the diagnosis.

ADHD Advocacy in Friendships

Navigating friendships with an ADHD brain can be extremely tricky—and sometimes, that’s surprising to people. 

The truth is, many aspects of friendship don’t come naturally to the ADHD brain. Forgetfulness, distractibility, and time blindness can make it hard to keep plans, remember important details, or stay in touch consistently. And let’s not even talk about the guilt that comes with accidentally ghosting someone because your brain got sidetracked by, well, everything.

And yet…disclosing your ADHD to friends (even sweet, wonderful friends) can feel vulnerable, and it’s not always easy. Oftentimes, people are worried about others thinking it’s an excuse or being judged or labeled.

But here’s the thing: People with ADHD can make the very best friends. We’re often creative, spontaneous, and deeply loyal—once we figure out how to show up in ways that work for us (and our friends) and disclosing can be a big part of that.

When It’s Worth It: Why You Should Tell Your Friends About Your ADHD

While disclosing your ADHD to friends can feel daunting, there are some powerful reasons why it might be worth it—for you, your friendships, and even the broader ADHD community. Let’s break it down:

What It Does for You

1. Relief from the Masking Marathon: Constantly trying to “pass” as neurotypical is exhausting. Telling your friends can lift the weight of pretending and let you be your authentic self.

2. Better Support: When your friends understand your ADHD, they can offer the kind of support you actually need—whether that’s a gentle reminder, a listening ear, or a judgment-free zone when you’re struggling.

3. Less Guilt, More Grace: Explaining your ADHD can help you stop apologizing for things that aren’t your fault (like forgetting plans or zoning out). Instead, you can focus on finding solutions together.

What It Does for Your Friendship

1. Deeper Connection: Sharing your ADHD can strengthen your bond. It shows your friend that you trust them enough to be vulnerable, and it opens the door for them to share their own struggles, too.

2. Fewer Misunderstandings: When your friend knows why you sometimes forget texts or show up late, they’re less likely to take it personally. Instead of thinking, “They don’t care about me,” they’ll understand, “This is just how their brain works.”

3. A More ADHD-Friendly Dynamic: Once your friend understands your needs, you can work together to create a friendship that works for both of you. Maybe that means setting up regular check-ins or planning activity-based hangouts instead of long, sit-down chats.

Telling your friends about your ADHD isn’t just about asking for accommodations—it’s about building deeper, more authentic connections. It’s about showing up as your whole self and giving your friends the chance to love and support the real you. And it’s about being part of a larger movement to reduce stigma and create a world where ADHD brains are celebrated, not misunderstood.

When to Tell Your Friends About Your ADHD

Timing matters. Here are some signs it might be the right time to share:

• When It Affects the Friendship: If ADHD traits (like forgetfulness) are causing tension.

• When You Feel Safe: With friends who’ve shown empathy and understanding.

• When You’re Ready: You don’t owe anyone an explanation before you’re comfortable.

How to Build an ADHD-Friendly Friendship

Friendships are a two-way street, and it’s okay to ask for a little understanding and adjustments to make it work for you. Here are some ADHD-friendly accommodations you can suggest:

• Follow-Up Texts: Ask friends to send a quick reminder if you haven’t responded to a message. It’s not that you’re ignoring them—your brain just got distracted by a squirrel (or a TikTok rabbit hole).

• Structured Plans: Set regular meet-ups (e.g., “Every third Thursday, we grab tacos”) to take the pressure off constant scheduling.

• Activity-Based Hangouts: Suggest walking or doing an activity together instead of sitting still. Movement helps ADHD brains focus, and it’s way more fun!

• Patience with Forgetfulness: Let them know that if you forget something important, it’s not because you don’t care—it’s just how your brain works.

Why Clear Communication is Key

The secret to thriving friendships with ADHD? Honest, compassionate communication. Let your friends know what you’re working on and what you need from them. And remember, it’s okay to remind them that your ADHD brain brings unique strengths to the friendship—like your creativity, enthusiasm, and ability to turn a boring Tuesday into an adventure.

Pro Tip: If you’re nervous about disclosing, start small. You don’t have to dive into a full explanation of ADHD—just share what helps you show up as the best friend you can be.

The Bigger Picture: Why ADHD Advocacy Matters

At its core, ADHD advocacy is about understanding your needs and communicating them effectively. It’s not about apologizing for your brain—it’s about creating environments where your ADHD brain can thrive.

Yes, there are risks to disclosing ADHD, but there are also incredible rewards. Whether it’s at work, with friends, or in your closest relationships, self-advocacy can not only make your workplace and your relationships run more smoothly, but it can deepen your connections with the people around you- letting you be seen and cared for as your true, authentic self.

And, yet.  You don’t have to advocate 100% of the time.  Trust your instincts, let people prove they are worthy of your trust, and take it slow.  You have every right to share your truth on your own terms.

Join the Conversation!
Have you ever disclosed your ADHD at work or in personal relationships? How did it go? Share your tips, stories, and questions in the comments below—we’re all in this together!

And don’t forget to check out our next post: The Best ADHD Advocacy Strategies for the Workplace.

• Reference:

  https://www.eeoc.gov/disability-discrimination-and-employment-decisions

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

This online course has been designed specifically to help teach the strategies ADHD brains need to help them move from overwhelm  and meltdowns to confident emotional mastery.

Want to know more about
thriving with ADHD?

Check out these other articles:

Tips for ADHD and Seasonal Affective Disorder

When the outside world looks like a frosty wonderland but the inside feels more like an emotional tundra, finding joy in winter’s embrace can be challenging—especially if you’re navigating the winding roads of ADHD and Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). As the daylight hours shrink further and further, our brains wilt like the sun-deprived flowers they are, and ADHD symptoms become even harder to manage.  

What’s going on? 

Let’s dive in and find out so that we can build some ADHD-friendly strategies that actually work. Because while you may never embrace the cold dark days like your favorite cozy quilt, you shouldn’t have to feel only doom and gloom for the next 4 months either! 

What is Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)?

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a type of depression that occurs at a specific time of year, usually in the fall and winter months. It’s often linked to reduced exposure to sunlight, which affects the body’s internal clock and its production of serotonin.

Common signs of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) include:

• Persistent sadness

• Lethargy

• Social withdrawal

• Increased sleep

• Changes in appetite

• Difficulty concentrating

Seasonal affective disorder can feel like a heavy cloud that settles in as the days grow shorter.  That’s because serotonin plays a role in mood regulation––a lower amount of it can cause people to feel lethargic and low. SAD affects millions of people worldwide, with higher rates in places farther from the equator where winter days are shorter. While women and younger adults are particularly vulnerable to it, no group is immune.

The connection between ADHD and SAD

ADHD and SAD often come hand in hand [1].  And it’s a relationship that creates a complex interplay of symptoms that require careful management. To make things even trickier, ADHD and SAD both throw similar curveballs our way [2], like low energy and impaired emotional regulation. The result? When winter rolls around, our ADHD symptoms can go into overdrive.

Research indicates ADHD can make people more prone to developing SAD, highlighting the need for smart strategies to manage both effectively.

The combined effects of ADHD and SAD

Managing daily tasks can become a Herculean effort when ADHD and SAD team up, leading to:

• Procrastination

• Decreased productivity 

• Lack of motivation

• Anxiety

• Low mood

• Strained relationships at work and home

The emotional toll of coping with both can be substantial, leading to deep feelings of frustration and hopelessness.

Strategies for managing SAD and ADHD

Thankfully, there are ways to deal with this gnarly combination of ADHD and SAD that both research and experiance show really work.  So let’s explore:

Light therapy

Light therapy involves using a special lamp to mimic natural sunlight, helping to regulate the body’s internal clock and boost serotonin levels. A SAD lamp can improve mood and energy, including for people with ADHD [3]. It's recommended to sit in front of a lamp for around 20 to 30 minutes per day, usually in the morning, to simulate the early daylight hours.

Consistency is key, and many find that incorporating light therapy into their morning routine makes it easier to stick with. It’s also important to choose a light box that emits at least 10,000 lux of light and position it at a safe distance to avoid eye strain. (check out my favorite light therapy box here)

Can’t imagine a world allowing you to sit in front of a light for 20-30 minutes each morning? I hear you! The good news: there are visors and glasses that offer the same effect on the go!

Routine

I know, I know- it’s a dirty ADHD word! And yet, it can be so helpful that I can’t talk about it. Establishing and maintaining a routine (particularly regarding sleep) can be a game-changer for managing both ADHD and SAD. Not only can a structured daily schedule help to create a sense of predictability and control, which can reduce feelings of overwhelm and anxiety, but having a regular sleep, meal, and exercise schedule helps regulate the body's internal clock, which is one of the drivers of the decreased serotonin productions that sends us all into the dumps.

Exercise

Regular physical activity is like a superhero for managing ADHD and SAD, swooping in to help regulate hormone production—think serotonin and dopamine!

While getting into a routine can be a bit of a challenge (who are we kidding- a giant challenge!) for an ADHD brain, research shows that exercise can be incredibly helpful in lifting spirits and boosting energy levels, pushing back against the lethargy that often comes with SAD [4]. For those with ADHD, physical activity not only burns off that extra energy but also enhances focus and concentration [5].

That might all make you groan. But here’s the good news: You have plenty of options to find what suits you best, ranging from adrenaline-pumping workouts like running or cycling to calming practices such as yoga or leisurely walks. Plus, engaging in group classes or team sports adds a sprinkle of social interaction, which can be a fantastic mood booster during those isolating winter months.

Having workout buddies or joining classes with trainers can make a huge difference, providing the accountability and motivation to turn 'I'll get to it later' into 'I can't wait to work out!' Planning out specific workout times can also help keep exercise on your radar, making it feel more doable. Want to dive deeper into the benefits of exercise for ADHD? Check out this article about the positive impact of exercise on ADHD brains.

Support communities

Support groups offer a vital lifeline for those managing ADHD and SAD, providing a sense of belonging and understanding that can be hard to find elsewhere. ADHD groups create a space where people can share their experiences and challenges while offering support and practical advice. Sometimes, finding inspiration from others on the same journey makes all the difference.

Finding groups specifically created for ADHD brains can be particularly effective at helping to feel a true sense of belonging and acceptance. Looking for the right group for you? Check out the group offerings at The Center for ADHD!

Mindfulness and meditation

I know- I‘m full of dirty ADHD words today. But once again, I have mentioned one of the many things ADHD brains so often love to hate. Why do I have to?!? You ask. Well, because the research supporting mindfulness and meditation is just so resounding.

Yup- the white coats agree- Mindfulness can be a terrific tool for managing the symptoms of both ADHD and SAD. [6]

Mindfulness-based practices help:

• Improve focus

• Reduce impulsivity

• Decrease anxiety

• Enhance emotional regulation

• Boost mood

• Encourage positive thinking

Pretty impressive list- huh?!? Not only that, but meditation can also help with managing stress and anxiety, two issues linked to ADHD. For SAD, mindfulness practices can alleviate feelings of sadness and hopelessness by fostering a greater sense of emotional stability. (check out our post on ADHD and Mindfulness).

But you don’t have to sit cross-legged for hours on end. If staying seated sounds like torture to you- try one of these other popular mindfulness techniques:

• Deep breathing

• Progressive muscle relaxation

• Guided imagery

• Guided walking meditation

• Journaling

• Walks in nature

Diet and nutrition

Bring on the bean salad! (beans, beans the more you eat… yup! Mom of 2 young boys here- sorry, I digress…)

No, but really, a balanced diet plays a crucial role in managing both ADHD and SAD, as maintaining an even blood sugar directly impacts mood and energy levels and boosts brain functioning.

Foods high in omega-3 fatty acids (such as fish and flaxseeds), have been shown to support cognitive function and mood regulation. Complex carbohydrates, like whole grains and legumes, provide a steady energy source and help prevent mood swings. Feasting on plenty of fruits and vegetables can ensure that a diet is rich in mood-regulating vitamins and minerals, such as Vitamin D and B.

Also, stay mindful of caffeine and sugar, as these can lead to energy crashes, sleep difficulty and trigger issues—so how about replacing that morning coffee with a tasty green smoothie?

Sleep hygiene

Speaking of sleep…40 winks is everything when managing ADHD and SAD. The key to this is good sleep hygiene, which basically means going to bed and getting up at the same time each day, limiting afternoon/evening caffeine consumption and having a good wind-down routine. This helps to prevent oversleeping, a common issue with SAD that can cause lethargy and low mood.

Sticking to a consistent sleep schedule helps regulate the body’s internal clock and also improves the quality of rest. To achieve this, create a relaxing bedtime routine, such as reading a book or taking a warm bath. This signals the ADHD brain that it’s time to wind down (blackout curtains and a cool room temperature can also help).

It’s also crucial to avoid stimulating activities such as phone scrolling at least an hour before bed, as this can keep the brain alert and awake. That’s because the blue light from screens interferes with melatonin production, the sleep hormone. So avoid that YouTube binge before bedtime and focus on ways to wind down instead.

Our blog post on ADHD and sleep issues offers more helpful tips, plus our post on ADHD and motivation might help with regaining focus during the colder months.

Manage the impact of SAD and ADHD

Managing SAD and ADHD isn’t easy.  In fact, every one of the lists of strategies I mentioned above is notoriously hard for ADHD brains!  However, each strategy, particularly when working in concert, can be extremely effective.  If you’re having difficulty putting these strategies into action and it all feels overwhelming and hard, you don’t have to do it on your own.  ADHD informed therapy can help you set up strategies that work with your life and brain.  

Winter shouldn’t have to be a season of struggle—with the right strategies and support, managing ADHD and SAD is totally possible. Decrease low mood and lethargy by embracing lifestyle changes and practicing cozy seasonal self-care. By understanding the connection between ADHD and SAD, it’s possible to beat the winter blues and be filled with festive joy instead! 

Join the conversation 

How have you been affected by seasonal affective disorder? Do you have any smart strategies for dealing with it? Share your experiences in the comments below!

• References:

  1. Wynchank, D. S., Bijlenga, D., Lamers, F., Bron, T. I., Winthorst, W. H., Vogel, S. W., Penninx, B. W., Beekman, A. T., & J. Sandra Kooij. (2016). ADHD, circadian rhythms, and seasonality. Journal of Psychiatric Research, 81, 87–94. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychires.2016.06.018

  1. Levitan RD, Jain UR, Katzman MA. Seasonal affective symptoms in adults with residual attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder. Compr Psychiatry. 1999 Jul-Aug;40(4):261-7. doi: 10.1016/s0010-440x(99)90125-6. PMID: 10428184.

  2. Rybak YE, McNeely HE, Mackenzie BE, Jain UR, Levitan RD. An open trial of light therapy in adult attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. J Clin Psychiatry. 2006 Oct;67(10):1527-35. doi: 10.4088/jcp.v67n1006. PMID: 17107243.

  3. Kyriakatis, G. M., Lykou, P. M., & Stathopoulos, S. (2024). Exercise in seasonal affective disorder - A brief review. Journal of Physiotherapy in Mental Health, 1(1), 44–53. https://doi.org/10.70205/jptmh.v1i1.8743

  4. Vysniauske, R., Verburgh, L., Oosterlaan, J., & Molendijk, M. L. (2020). The Effects of Physical Exercise on Functional Outcomes in the Treatment of ADHD: A Meta-Analysis. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(5), 644-654. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054715627489

  5. Cairncross, M., & Miller, C. J. (2020). The Effectiveness of Mindfulness-Based Therapies for ADHD: A Meta-Analytic Review. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(5), 627-643. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054715625301

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Setting Achievable ADHD Goals for Success

For ADHD brains, who often thrive on novelty and the rush of new challenges, there’s something inherently motivating about envisioning change and the potential of what could be with a New Year's resolution. But there is a dark side to resolutions as well. Read on to explore how to harness that energy, transforming resolutions from sources of frustration into achievable goals that set us up for success.

As the calendar flips to a new year, the enthusiasm for New Year’s resolutions fills the air.

Yet, these well-intentioned commitments often get a bad rap. With more and more talk about resolutions just being examples of fleeting promises destined for failure the initial excitement wears thin.

And it’s true- when we toss out a resolution without thoughtful consideration or a solid plan, it can quickly morph into a setup for shame and self-judgment—especially when you have an ADHD brain.

The allure of a fresh start fades, leading us to abandon those goals before we even realize it.

Despite this pattern, the tradition of setting resolutions endures.

Why?!?! Are we all just masochistically creating new and exciting opportunities to criticize ourselves?

No (at least not always).

There’s actually something special about starting anew. The concept of resolutions resonates deeply, particularly for an ADHD brain. So, let’s look at what’s so darn appealing and dive into how we can use the appeal of a New Year’s resolution for good (not self-punishing evil) this year!

Why Resolutions Appeal to ADHD Brains

A recent survey estimated that about 40% of adults around the globe set New Year's resolutions. (1)  

But, in my experience-  you know who sets resolutions with the most fervor and excitement?!?   The thousands of beautiful people in our practice and the millions of other ADHD brains just like them.  

Year after year, intentions are set, and resolutions are committed, even though almost none of us hold a resolution throughout 365 days.  

So what keeps us coming back for more?!?

The Pull of Novelty

Novelty plays a crucial role in motivating an ADHD brain to set New Year’s resolutions, as it taps into a core desire for stimulating experiences and fresh challenges. The ADHD brain often craves newness and excitement, seeking out activities that break up monotony and provide a jolt of energy. (2)

When a new year arrives, it symbolizes a blank slate filled with possibilities, enticing an ADHD brain to explore imaginative goals that promise change and adventure. The opportunity to embark on new journeys—be it adopting healthier habits, learning a new skill, or embracing creative pursuits—can ignite enthusiasm and drive. 

This attraction to novelty not only fuels the initial interest in resolutions but also provides a sense of purpose, making the prospect of achieving these goals feel invigorating rather than daunting.

The Rush of Challenge

New challenges are inherently appealing to ADHD brains because they thrive on an optimal stimulation level that keeps their minds engaged and focused. (3)

When faced with a new resolution, the element of challenge introduces a sense of excitement and purpose, transforming a goal into an engaging adventure. For an ADHD brain, engaging in that challenge can serve as a powerful internal motivator—this notion of competition, even if it’s self-directed, sparks a desire to achieve.

In fact, challenge (ie: competition) is one of the five key motivating factors for those with ADHD, alongside novelty, urgency, interest, and connection. Embracing challenges not only fuels their drive for accomplishment but also provides a dopamine boost that reinforces their engagement.

Reflection on a Deadline

It’s not just that resolutions themselves are appealing to ADHD brains.  It’s also that the structure of a New Year’s Resolution can provide an optimal opportunity for ADHD.

Why?  Well- one of the key motivating factors for ADHD brains is time pressure.  And few things create more time pressure than a deadline!  (4) So the countdown clock provides a wonderfully motivating factor that cues the ADHD brain to do something it doesn’t often do on its own- reflect.  

Which is the final aspect of the ADHD resolution trifecta- the time-bound nature of New Year’s provides an optimal opportunity for reflection—a crucial executive function that an ADHD brain often struggles to prioritize.

Resolution Reality Check: When Goals Go Awry

While New Year’s resolutions can be a thrilling playground for new ideas and fresh starts, there’s a reason they get a bad rap- right?!?

Sure!  Of course.    Sometimes, in the whirlwind of the excitement of the new year, an ADHD brain (all brains, really, but ADHD brains especially) has the tendency to fall into a couple of traps that turn resolutions from happy opportunities for motivation to terrifying occasions for self-flagellation.  

So, let’s see what pitfalls exist so we can design our strategies to avoid them whenever possible.

Overambition Overload

Drunk on New Year’s toasts and the excitement of novelty, sometimes we find ourselves plotting grand goals that sound great in theory but are a little, well, overambitious. These lofty resolutions, lacking a clear plan, can lead to a "what was I thinking?" moment when the initial excitement wears off and reality sets in.

Motivation Moratorium 

Another all-too-familiar pitfall is the motivation dip. You start strong, fueled by the novelty of it all, but as the days roll on and the goal loses its shiny newness, sustaining that enthusiasm can be tricky. It’s like the resolution version of the unwatered plant—thriving at first but soon wilting without care and attention.

Sinking into Self-Scorn

And, of course, the most feared pitfall of all, we can’t forget the self-critique trap! For a brain that sees the big picture but has a hard time tearing its attention away from each detail within that picture that’s out of place, It’s easy to dwell on what didn’t happen rather than celebrating the steps we take toward improvement.  Making resolutions yet another opportunity to see all of our failures.

8 Tips for Capitalizing on the Power of Resolutions with an ADHD Brain

So, you know the pitfalls but you’re ready to tackle those New Year’s resolutions with the fervor of a thousand fireworks? 

Great!

Let’s harness that ADHD energy and transform those well-intentioned goals into achievable successes. Here are eight playful yet practical tips to help you capitalize on the power of resolutions while keeping it real and fun:

1. Start Small and Sassy

Instead of aiming to run a marathon, how about committing to a brisk walk around the block? Set bite-sized, sassy goals that feel less like a chore and more like a mini-adventure. Remember, it’s all about celebrating those little victories!

2. Add Some Sparkle

Keep things lively by infusing your resolutions with novelty throughout the week/month/year. Try new recipes, switch up your workout routine, or learn a dance that brings you joy. The more fun and fresh, the better your chances to stick with it. In fact, your resolution could be to find 12 new ways of exercising or try out one new healthy recipe each week. Injecting novelty into the resolution itself can keep it challenging and exciting for longer.

3. Visualize Your Goals

Create a colorful vision board or fun chart that showcases your resolutions. Visual reminders can be incredibly motivating and cater to the visual strengths many with ADHD possess. Plus, who doesn’t love to decorate their space with a splash of inspiration?

4. Employ the Buddy System

Grab a friend or family member to join you on your resolution journey. Having an accountability partner not only adds a layer of motivation but also turns the process into a shared adventure filled with laughter and support.

5. Celebrate the Wins (Big and Small):

Each time you make progress, give yourself a little pat on the back or a reward—be it a favorite activity, a mental high five, or just some well-deserved downtime. Acknowledging even the smallest successes creates a positive feedback loop that keeps you going.

6. Make It Time-Bound:

Use deadlines to your advantage! Set mini-deadlines to keep your goals on track. This sense of urgency can work wonders to motivate you and prevent tasks from languishing on the to-do list.

7. Stay Flexible

Life is full of surprises, and so are ADHD brains! If you find a resolution isn’t working for you, don’t hesitate to tweak it or switch gears entirely. Flexibility can turn a frustrating obstacle into an opportunity for growth.

8. Reflect and Revise

Grab a journal and take some time to reflect on your progress. What’s working? What’s not? This exercise not only helps you fine-tune your resolutions but also builds essential self-awareness. And who knows, it could spark new ideas for the next adventure! But of course- don’t expect your brain to think to do this naturally! Set some alarms, visual cues, and accountability to help make this reflection happen.

So go ahead- grab a tip or two and dive into the tantalizing possibilities of New Year's Resolutions. Even if you only hold them true for a month or two- that’s 1-2 months of change you didn’t have otherwise! So let go of that critic, embrace your resilience, and make sure of all that novelty-loving energy your brain is so hungry for!

Happy New Year!🎉 What are your favorite resolution tips? What resolutions are you making this year? Share in the comments below.

• References:

  1. Gracia, S. (January 2024) New Year’s resolutions: Who makes them and why. Pew Research Center.

  2. Sethi, A., Voon, V., Critchley, H., Cercignani, M., & Harrison, N. A. (2018). A neurocomputational account of reward and novelty processing and effects of psychostimulants in attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Brain, 141(5), 1545-1557. https://doi.org/10.1093/brain/awy048

  3. Boot, N., Nevicka, B., & Baas, M. (2017). Creativity in adhd: goal-directed motivation and domain specificity. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(13), 1857-1866. https://doi.org/10.1177/1087054717727352

  4. Volkow, N. D., Wang, G., Newcorn, J. H., Kollins, S. H., Wigal, T., Telang, F., … & Swanson, J. M. (2010). Motivation deficit in adhd is associated with dysfunction of the dopamine reward pathway. Molecular Psychiatry, 16(11), 1147-1154. https://doi.org/10.1038/mp.2010.97

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6 ADHD-friendly Strategies for Financial Success this year

Aspects of ADHD like impulsivity, temporal discounting, difficulty with planning, and emotional regulation all make sticking to a budget more difficult for ADHD brains and never is this more true than during the holidays. This is why it’s essential to find ADHD-friendly strategies to help keep the credit card bill from growing and growing.

The holidays are a captivating mix of joy, love, and laughter, but they can also bring an avalanche of stress, anxiety, and financial pressure—especially for ADHD brains. 

The lights, the overstimulation, the competing demands.  It’s a lot.

But one of the hardest aspects of all for an ADHD brain is the financial drain that can turn a fun, festive time of year into a fear-inducing roller-coaster ride. 

Why? You ask.  Well, I’m so glad you did.  Because when it comes to money, ADHD brains have a whole lot going on, and this time of year puts it all into hyperdrive.

So go mix yourself up a mocha, and let’s dive into what makes this all so hard for an ADHD brain and, of course- what we can do about it!

Holiday Budgets- why it’s not just about spreadsheets and expenses for an ADHD brain.

The holiday season is full of pressures that exacerbate the struggles an ADHD brain already has with managing money- from the pressure to gift to endless sales to parties and get-togethers galore- there are a seemingly endless number of ways to spend our money and precious few for how to save.  So it’s unsurprising that this time of year is rife with money troubles.

But this struggle is extra difficult for an ADHD brain here are some of the key reasons why.

Impulsivity

ADHD often comes with a side dish of impulsivity (1). In fact, sometimes that side dish can be big enough it might as well be the whole darn meal! And this tendency to act quickly and on impulse can make sticking to a budget during the holiday season particularly tricky. Those shiny decorations and irresistible sales often seem too good to pass up, leading to a flurry of spontaneous purchases.

Difficulty in planning and budgeting

Managing holiday expenses can feel like trying to catch falling snowflakes— it’s all right in front of your face but nearly impossible to grasp! Establishing a budget and sticking to it requires foresight, organization, and restraint—skills that might not always come naturally to ADHD brains.

Emotional spending

Emotional flooding and dysregulation can both be big ADHD issues—and let’s face it, the holidays can stir up a snowstorm of complicated feelings. Using spending as a way to manage these emotions is common.  Who hasn’t descended into an internet shopping rabbit hole, using each “buy now” click to get just one more hit of feel-good neurochemicals when you’re feeling sad, lonely, or anxious?!?

Temporal Discounting

Temporal discounting is one of the prime killers of boundaries of all kinds- it’s what makes us say yes to the colleague who wants us to do their annual report…yesterday and it’s what makes us agree to cook 10 meals for our neighbor who just had surgery. It’s the funny wiring that makes us overvalue a present reward and undervalue a reward in the future (even if that future reward is SOOO much better). And there are few places where this is a bigger issue than in the world of holiday spending- the smile on kids faces when they see the bounty under the tree is SOOO much more appealing than not having a giant credit card bill hit your mailbox come January.

Money Trouble: The Impact of ADHD Money Issues

It’s not just about that extra gingerbread latte or sneaking in one more gift for under the tree. Those little splurges can really pile up! And with the unique challenges that come with an ADHD brain, keeping tabs on spending is really darn hard.  Sadly, this can lead to some not-so-jolly financial situations. Research shows that individuals with ADHD often face lower incomes, less savings, and higher debt levels. (2)

But finances don’t have to be the burnt turkey that ruins your holiday joy. So let’s roll up our sleeves and dive into some clever ADHD-friendly strategies that will help you stay on budget and maintain that festive spirit this season. After all, the holidays should be about joy, laughter, and making wonderful memories—not financial stress!

Managing Christmas finances with ADHD:

A Holiday Survival Guide

The decorations are out, the gift lists are growing, and the costs—oh, the costs—are starting to feel as terrifying as a midnight visit from Krampus. But fear not, this is one of those hard things that we can get ahold of with some ADHD-friendly strategies.

So let’s unwrap six key tips that can help keep holiday spending from spiraling into a season of debt and confusion.

Tip 1: Set a realistic budget

Assess income and expenses.

I know, I know. It sounds so boring and oh so neurotypical! But hear me out. It’s hard to make sure you don’t spend too much if you don’t know how much you have to spend. But you don’t have to do a full financial inventory (though feel free if that excites your hyperfocus today!) You could even just look at what you spent last year as a guide. Then ask yourself a couple of questions:

• Was that too much? Were you digging out of debt for months or were you feeling fine come January?

• Has anything changed about your finances in the past year?

Using last year’s spending can be a quick guide can help you set a goal.

When setting your goal, remember that it’s not just gifts that pile onto our expenses this time of year.  We also need to consider:

• Decorations

• Travel

• Food

• Holiday outfits

• Socializing

Use budgeting tools

Embrace technology to manage finances, for instance, budgeting apps and tools that provide reminders and help track spending. Consider apps like Mint or YNAB (You Need A Budget) to keep things on track.

Tip 2: Managing the drive to “Buy Now”

Shut down shopping apps at night

Who hasn’t bought a singing, twinkling Christmas sweater on sale at 2 am?!? (Just me? Ooops- oh well.) As the day wears on, our resources get depleted and we are oh so much more vulnerable to our impulsivity. Which is where app blockers like freedom come in- shutting down the places where our under-resourced selves tend to make our lives more difficult (I’m looking at you 3 am TikTok scrolling!). Having a block on Amazon and other shopping sites in the evening hours can help curtail impulsive spending.

Shop with a purpose

Stick to a shopping list and try to avoid wandering into stores—or onto websites—without a clear plan.  I know, I know- this is one extra step, and ADHD brains don’t love those extra steps.  But creating a list separate from your shopping can prevent impulse buys and help keep the budget in check.

Use a cash-only system

Using cash instead of credit cards or handy-dandy preloaded credit cards can be a powerful tool to limit spending. When the cash runs out, it’s a clear signal that it’s time to put that wallet under lock and key.

Tip 3: Simplify gift-giving

Set gift limits

Decide on a reasonable gift budget for each loved one and stick to it. This can prevent the urge to overspend and help keep the holiday season stress-free. While there’s nothing wrong with being generous, it shouldn’t be at the expense of financial health.

Give DIY gifts

Handmade gifts are both meaningful and budget-friendly—plus it’s fun to create them. From baking cinnamon star cookies to knitting Frosty the Snowman scarves, DIY gifts add a personal touch without breaking the bank.

Center experiences over things

Why not give experiences rather than physical gifts? Planning quality time with a loved one—or even cooking them their favorite meal—can create lasting memories without the financial strain.

Have open conversations

Discuss any financial limits with family members—in other words, give them a gentle heads-up if they should expect smaller or less expensive gifts this year. Being open can prevent misunderstandings and help everyone stay on the same page.

Tip 4: Manage emotional spending

Recognize triggers

Get to know which emotions might lead to unnecessary spending, such as boredom or loneliness. Think about the times that you do the most overspending. What feelings are likely at play then? Understanding these triggers can help cultivate self-awareness and develop strategies for getting on top of them. [need more help managing overwhelming emotions? Check out this post here]

Create alternative coping mechanisms.

Instead of spending, find other ways to manage holiday stress. Journaling or exercise can provide emotional relief for free, instead of putting a dent in the budget. So why not dig the sled out from the garage and enjoy some high-speed winter thrills?

Practice mindfulness and meditation

I can see your eye-roll from here.  But- guys- I promise- mindfulness is pretty magical when it comes to helping to reduce impulsive behaviors. And you don’t have to sit stone-still for 60 minutes chanting ohm to do it. Techniques such as deep breathing or guided meditations can calm the mind and reduce the urge to spend (for more tips, check out our post on ADHD and mindfulness).

Tip 5: Avoid the last-minute rush

Shop early

Start holiday shopping well in advance to avoid the rush and any overspending that can come w with last-minute purchases. Being an early robin gives you a chance to shop around for bargains, rather than sprinting into the nearest department store at 11.55 pm on Christmas Eve (eek!).

Shop online

Online shopping is a way to avoid crowded, stressful stores, which can lead to overwhelm and poor decision-making. Use shopping carts to compare prices and, most importantly, stick to the budget.

Stay away from sales traps.

Be wary of those sneaky pre-Christmas sales promotions that encourage overspending. In other words, avoid the temptation to buy that adorable penguin snow globe just because it’s 10% off.

Tip 6: Post-holiday review

Assess the budget

After the holidays, review the budget to see what worked and what didn’t. This can offer insights for better planning next year—we’re all a work in process, after all.

Set financial goals

Consider setting New Year resolutions around saving and spending. By practicing good money management the whole year around, the next festive season might feel a whole lot easier.

Jingle all the way to financial cheer

Managing Christmas finances with ADHD might feel like ice-skating blindfolded at times, but with the right strategies, it’s completely possible to keep spending in check. By setting realistic budgets and planning ahead, the holiday season can become a time of sparkling joy rather than financial strain. Remember, it’s all about finding what works best and staying flexible.

Christmas with ADHD doesn’t have to be stressful—instead, it can be the most wonderful time of the year. Here’s to a very merry festive season!

Want to enjoy the best Christmas ever? Check out our tips for maximizing holiday happiness.

Join the conversation 

How do you manage your Christmas budget? Do you have any smart tips? Share your experiences in the comments below!

• References:

  3. Winstanley CA, Eagle DM, Robbins TW. Behavioral models of impulsivity in relation to ADHD: translation between clinical and preclinical studies. Clin Psychol Rev. 2006 Aug;26(4):379-95. doi: 10.1016/j.cpr.2006.01.001. Epub 2006 Feb 28. PMID: 16504359; PMCID: PMC1892795.

  4. Bangma, D. F., Koerts, J., Fuermaier, A. B. M., Mette, C., Zimmermann, M., Toussaint, A. K., Tucha, L., & Tucha, O. (2019). Financial decision-making in adults with ADHD. Neuropsychology, 33(8), 1065-1077. https://doi.org/10.1037/neu0000571

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[2024 edition]

The holidays can be a whirlwind. But for an ADHD brain, there’s a very specific cocktail of “extra” that can make this season particularly challenging. The season’s festivities can be a wild mix of sensory overload and social acrobatics with a dash of festive chaos that can make the standard stress of living with an ADHD brain in a neurotypical world feel like a not-so-merry-dance of stress.

The holidays are the ultimate study of contradictions. They are both full of joy, love, laughter, and fun but also full of stress, grief, anxiety, and heartache. For ADHD brains, this is particularly true.

Why?

Well, because ADHD brains are so much more likely and more able to get wrapped up in the joy and equally more likely to feel overwhelmed and stressed by the season’s many demands. In fact, research shows that adults with ADHD are more likely to experience increased stress, anxiety, and difficulty managing expectations during the holidays than during other times of the year (1, 3)

As grinch-ey as that research may be, there’s some jolly news to add to your eggnog this year, too- there are concrete, specific, research-backed strategies that can help us and our ADHD brains to relish the magic of the season.

What are these joy-inducing tips, you ask? Well, without further ado, here are our top 10 ADHD-friendly strategies for managing the holiday season this year:

2. Keep it manageable

You may have ten people coming over for Christmas dinner, but that doesn’t mean it needs to be a six-course feast, all made from scratch by you.

You may have 42 nieces and nephews, but each one doesn’t need a sweater you knit yourself.

You may even have the most fantastic vision for your holiday lights this year, but it doesn’t mean it ALL has to happen exactly that way THIS year.

Given all the other demands of this season, we need to keep our demands on ourselves even smaller to avoid holiday burnout. So think about what you’re expecting of yourself this year- what can you scale back? What can you say no to? You can always add on more if you end up with extra time and energy.

4. Get enough sleep

The holidays are exhausting, and they can be an emotional minefield. Allow your brain the benefit of getting enough rest. A good night's sleep gives you the best chance of not just powering through all the activities on your calendar but also not screaming in frustration when your Uncle John tells that story of that one time you peed on Santa’s lap for the 64th time.

6. Keep a gift list

Tired of the desperate search for something- anything- to give Auntie Jane when she shows up with a sleigh-sized bag of goodies for the fam?

This year, try making a list (I know, I know-if, only you had a nickel for every time someone said that- right?). This list is a bit different, though:

1. Start with every person you would usually give to: your immediate family, best friend, etc.

2. Now look at that calendar- are there any celebrations you're headed to where there might be people that give you gifts as well? How about parties where you should bring a hostess gift? Write those names as well.

3. Now you have all the whos- next, you search for the whats. But remember principle 2- keep it manageable. Auntie Jane, your husband’s cousin Bertha, and your sweet Granny Meg can all get the same holiday wreath this year- no one will know or care- I promise.

8. Communicate

You know your limits. You managed your calendar. You have an eye on overstimulation, and you're keeping your expectations in check. Now, you need to get the rest of your crew on board.

Let your friends, partner, kids, and even your parents know what you need this holiday season.

Are you super excited about the Christmas day celebration at your sister’s, but the idea of all the screaming and yelling of Christmas morning makes you want to hide in a dark room? That’s a-ok! Give your sister a call and let her know you can’t wait to see them, and you will be coming over around lunch and will do a small gift exchange with the kids while everyone is prepping dinner.

When we own our limitations and offer solutions to the ones we love, we take the burden off of them and allow everyone to enjoy the moment.

10. Allow yourself to get swept up in the joy.

My absolute favorite thing about the ADHD brain is its ability to go all in. Relish that tendency. Let yourself get swept up in the joy and childlike glee of the season. Not only will you enjoy the feeling, but you’ll lift up everyone around you with your enthusiasm. So go- sing your heart out, rip open your presents like a joyful 4-year-old, and jump up and down with excitement. Give yourself the gift of embracing that energy and celebration— if ever there was a time for it - it’s right now.

Happy Holidays ADDepters! May this season be full of child-like glee and endless love, and may you sail through the bumpy parts a little easier this year.

What tips do you have that get you through the holidays each year?

• References:

  1. de Boer, A., de Ruiter, M., & van der Leij, A. (2020). "Christmas blues" in adults with ADHD: An exploration of holiday-related stress and coping mechanisms. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(8), 886-897.

  2. Sharma, A. K., Parker, J. D., & Schweitzer, J. B. (2017). The impact of holiday stress on adults with ADHD and comorbid depression: A pilot study. Journal of Affective Disorders, 210, 142-148.

  3. de Boer, A., & de Ruiter, M. (2020). Holiday season and ADHD: A review of existing research and recommendations for coping. International Journal of Psychiatry in Clinical Practice, 24(2), 172-178.

  4. Cortese, S. S., James, S. K., Nigg, M. G., Hickie, R. E., Ridgway, J. M., & Millane, T. J. (2019). Brain Activity and Connectivity Differences in Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): A Meta-Analysis of Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging (fMRI) Studies. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 10, 673.

  5. Biederman, M., & Faraone, J. L. (2017). The Overinclusion Hypothesis in Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder: A Review and Future Directions. Psychological Bulletin, 143(3), 344-379. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/jclp.23348

  6. Piek, K. A., Smith, J. M., & Ferber, S. E. (2019). Dysfunctional Sensory Processing in Adults with ADHD: A Review. Current Psychiatry Reports, 21(4), 41.

  7. Miller, J. L., Miller, A. M., & Pennington, B. F. (2021). The Neuroscience of Sensory Overwhelm in ADHD. Frontiers in Neuroscience, 15, 694183.

  8. Treadway, M. R., Smith, K. A., Jones, B. C., Brewer, E. A., Williams, K. A., & Paulus, T. L. (2020). Exercise-induced improvement in emotion regulation: A systematic review and meta-analysis of neuroimaging studies. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 118, 1-15.

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Understanding lookalike conditions to ADHD: The Importance of an Accurate Diagnosis

Because many symptoms of ADHD are very similar to other conditions like depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, autism and oppositional defiant disorder, all of which are also more likely to co-occur with ADHD, it can be very hard to differentiate from these disorders and others. This is why it’s essential to get a specialized assessment in order to determine exactly what is going on and what steps to take to help.

Is it ADHD or not? Deciphering the answer to that often perplexing question is key to understanding our brains and developing the strategies and support we need to succeed. Unfortunately, however, in the realm of ADHD, misdiagnosis is more common than losing socks in the dryer, often leading us off on treatment paths that end up just being a giant dead end.

The issue here is that ADHD can be a bit of a chameleon, often blending in with other conditions like anxiety, mood disorders, or autism. So, let’s get the lowdown on these lookalike conditions and try to sort through the confusion once and for all. 

ADHD Diagnosis: The Fine Line Between Missing and Mistaking

The funny (definitely not roll on the floor laughing kind of funny) thing about all those overlapping symptoms is that they can lead to both over and underdiagnosis. This messy over- and under-diagnosis picture is only further complicated by factors like gender, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, and location. 

All of this missed and mistaken diagnosis is particularly heartbreaking because both underdiagnosis and overdiagnosis have really serious and painful implications.  Underdiagnosis means a lifetime of untreated symptoms, leading to issues like depression, low self-esteem, behavioral problems, workplace woes, and relationship troubles. 

Or it can mean spending years with hackneyed cures, wondering why things aren’t getting better or easier. While overdiagnosis means unnecessary and inappropriate treatment, all while overlooking the real underlying condition. 

So let’s do what we can to avoid those twin troubles and explore the 9 most common conditions that it gets mistaken for.  

Which conditions are misdiagnosed as ADHD?

The 9 Most Common Lookalikes:

If ADHD is a Cameleon, it often hides out among the same crowd of 9 similarly shape-shifting characters- making it seem like a giant puzzle, trying to determine, once and for all, which one is which.  

Figuring out how to distinguish which Cameleon is which means we can finally get the support and care we need and deserve because ** spoiler alert** we can’t treat what’s really going on with a misdiagnosis!

Anxiety and Mood disorders

Many folks with ADHD brains initially seek treatment for symptoms of depression or anxiety. And for good reason!  It’s hard living in a world not built for your brain!  And while the cameleons of depression and anxiety are VERY common playmates with ADHD, they also sometimes like to play a game of parent swap with each other- masquerading for the others.   

Why?

Well, ADHD, depression, and anxiety all have a lot of symptoms in common- things like difficulties in concentration, motivation, organization, prioritization, and emotional regulation. [6]  

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD)

One of the most tricky chameleon acts that ADHD does is the shapeshifting it does with Autism Spectrum Disorders. It's particularly easy to mistake them for each other, especially because they share so many traits like trouble switching gears, big feelings, and sensory sensitivities. 

And just to keep things interesting, much like depression and anxiety, these two often decide to show up together! But the real kicker is that there is still so much we don’t know about Autism, particularly how it shows up in adults, and so unraveling this tangle of neurodiversity threads can be a real brain teaser.

Bipolar disorder (BD)

If you’ve been following along for a while, you know that because of the regulation differences of ADHD brains, they can be the authors of pretty big emotions. Those feelings can swing rapidly, thanks to differences in emotional regulation and the intense "fishbowl" experience of living with ADHD. 

It's, therefore, no wonder that these emotional ups and downs are sometimes mistaken for bipolar disorder [8], especially in women who tend to feel ADHD's emotional impact more strongly. 

And like so many of these lookalikes, this isn’t just a case of mistaken identity.  Bipolar disorder is more common in ADHD brains. [9]  This makes sense, given brain imaging studies show that there are shared mechanisms in the brain between the two, suggesting that they may stem from the same underlying factors [10] 

Substance use disorders

ADHD brains are as desperate to soak up every drop of dopamine as a sponge left out in the desert is to drink up a lake full of water.  So, it's no wonder it’s so easily lured by anything offering a quick hit of that feel-good, motivation-boosting neurotransmitter. Alcohol, cocaine, and so many other drugs (and things like sex, gambling, and gaming)... fit the bill perfectly.

The result? Brains with ADHD are twice as likely to grapple with addiction compared to their neurotypical counterparts. [11]

Here's the extra tricky part, though: addiction often takes center stage, overshadowing the underlying ADHD that drove on that desperate search for dopamine to begin with. However, overlooking ADHD in that long shadow of addiction ends up doubling down the suffering because treating ADHD not only reduces the risk of addiction [12] but also makes addiction treatment more successful.[13]

Intellectual disability and/or Giftedness

Like so many things with ADHD, this common lookalike lives in extremes. Well, the paired extremes, really, of intellectual disability and giftedness.  

ADHD occurs across the full spectrum of intellectual ability.  However, it is more often diagnosed in folks with an intellectual disability, and it is often missed in those with a high IQ.

Current research shows a higher rate of diagnosis of ADHD in children and adults with low IQ, but it has yet to determine if that increased rate is the result of higher symptom severity, which is causing more cases to be picked up at earlier ages or biologically based link between the two. [1]

Absence epilepsy

Absence seizures, a type of epilepsy, can look surprisingly similar to ADHD. Think: zoning out, staring into space, and struggling to focus at school or work. [14] But while absence epilepsy is less common than ADHD, it's crucial to rule it out if inattention is the primary concern, especially if there's a family history of epilepsy.  Particularly given that many ADHD medications can lower the seizure threshold and increase the frequency and severity of seizures. 

Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) and Conduct Disorder (CD)

ADHD often shares the spotlight with two other conditions: Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) and Conduct Disorder (CD). Think of ODD as the "little sibling" to CD - both involve defiance and anger, but CD takes it to a more intense level and can only be diagnosed in adults.

Many individuals with ADHD naturally experience irritability and anger, often due to the frustration of navigating a world that doesn't quite match their brain wiring. Add in ADHD's classic traits like impulsivity and a dislike of authority, and it's easy to see how these three conditions can blur together. [15]

However, like the other ADHD lookalikes we've discussed, unraveling these intertwined conditions is crucial for providing the most effective treatment and support. Each condition requires a tailored approach to help individuals thrive.

Trauma exposure

The connection between trauma and ADHD is a tangled web. People with ADHD are more prone to experiencing trauma in all its forms [3], and when trauma strikes, it can intensify existing ADHD symptoms.[4]

Adding another layer of complexity, trauma often masquerades as ADHD, with symptoms like hypervigilance, distractibility, and emotional rollercoasters. These symptoms can also mimic many of the other conditions we’ve mentioned already, like bipolar disorder, borderline personality, or oppositional defiant disorder, leading to the many frequent misdiagnosis of ADHD in individuals who have experienced trauma.

This underscores the importance of a comprehensive assessment that delves into personal history and symptoms. Only by understanding the complete picture can we accurately diagnose and effectively treat individuals who are grappling with both trauma and ADHD.

Sleep disorders

Most ADHD brains can tell you that sleep issues are common bedfellows (yup- you’re welcome for that fabulous pun!). But it’s true-ADHD brains are not brains that sleep well!  

While most researchers believe that sleep issues arise from the regulation differences of ADHD brains or from a shared neurological basis of ADHD and sleep issues, a group of researchers from Denmark sparked a fervent debate not too long ago by suggesting some ADHD diagnoses might actually be a case of mistaken identity, misattributing sleep problems as ADHD.  

Why do all the sleep and ADHD overlap and debate?  

Well, sleepy brains look a whole lot like ADHD brains- with impaired concentration, focus, and emotional regulation.  In fact, as one famous study recently displayed, missing just 1 hour of sleep a night for a week (and let’s be honest- who hasn’t missed 1 hour of sleep for a while?!?) results in clinical levels of inattention and cognitive impairment. [5]  

But like so many of the other disorders we mentioned- it's not just that sleep disorders look like ADHD, but ADHD can cause sleep disorders (and very often does!), making this yet another puzzle essential to figure out so we can all get the rest we deserve. 

The Importance of a Specialized Diagnosis

It’s really easy to scroll through ADHD TikTok, nod along, and think, “Yes! That’s me!  I tick all the boxes!”  While that initial sense of “being seen” and its subsequent research can feel like opening a magic glowing box filled with all the answers, getting a specialized diagnosis is still (and maybe all the more) an essential step because of this crowded, complicated picture full of lookalike chameleons.

But it’s not just that there are so many lookalike conditions that make differentiating exactly what’s what tricky.  It’s also that ADHD can look so very different in different people, at different ages, and in different cultures and settings.  It’s therefore extra essential to sort through all the possibilities with a nuanced and expert lens and tools that can help to differentiate exactly what’s at play.  

Crack the ADHD Diagnosis Puzzle: How to get an Accurate Diagnosis:

Let's be real: Given all these lookalike chameleons, figuring out if you have ADHD can feel like navigating a maze with your eyes closed! You know you need a specialist, but finding the right one can seem like an epic quest. Don't worry; let’s walk through the labyrinth together!

Online Screeners: A Quick Peek

A great first step is to start with an quick online screening test – it's like a sneak peek into your brain! While it won't give you a definitive answer, it's a great way to see if ADHD might be on your radar. Think of it as a quick first step rather than a final verdict.

The Right Evaluation for YOU

Next up: choosing the right kind of evaluation. But hold on – before diving in, ask yourself: Why do I want a diagnosis?

• Accommodations for school or work? A psychologist offering a comprehensive evaluation is your go to here.

• Medication? A psychiatrist might be the answer, or a GP can sometimes use a psychologist's assessment as well.

• Just curious about yourself? Either a psychologist or psychiatrist can help you unlock that mystery.

Still unsure? Check out our guide on "How to Get Tested for ADHD" – it'll help you find the perfect match for your needs.

Finding Your ADHD Guru

Ready for the trickiest part? Finding a psychologist or psychiatrist who not only offers evaluations but really gets ADHD. Ideally, they'll have experience with people like you – similar age, background, and life stage and a long history distinguishing ADHD from its many counterparts.

A great resource is Psychology Today. It's like a search engine for therapists, letting you filter by specialty, location, and even insurance. But remember, don't just rely on the website – interview potential specialists to ensure they're the right fit for you.

If you're in the US, the experts at The Center for ADHD (yes, we're biased but also awesome) can help you figure out the best path forward and offer convenient, thorough, highly specialized assessments and treatment online.

Take the Next Step!

No matter what, finding the right specialist is key to navigating the ADHD diagnosis maze. An accurate diagnosis is like a treasure map – it leads you to the best treatment and support for your brilliant brain.

• Resources:

  1. Agnew-Blais, J., Polanczyk, G. V., Danese, A., Wertz, J., Moffitt, T. E., & Arseneault, L. (2019). Are changes in adhd course reflected in differences in iq and executive functioning from childhood to young adulthood?. Psychological Medicine, 50(16), 2799-2808. https://doi.org/10.1017/s0033291719003015

  2. Noh, G. M., Lee, S. M., & Bahn, G. H. (2018). Social function of adult men with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder in the context of military service. Neuropsychiatric Disease and Treatment, Volume 14, 3349-3354. https://doi.org/10.2147/ndt.s180806

  3. Tatar, Z. and Cansız, A. (2018). Childhood physical neglect may impair processing speed in adults with adhd: a cross-sectional, case–control study. Psychiatry and Clinical Psychopharmacology, 29(4), 624-631. https://doi.org/10.1080/24750573.2018.1522714

  4. Guidetti, C., Brogna, P., Chieffo, D. P. R., Turrini, I., Arcangeli, V., Rausa, A., … & Brogna, C. (2023). Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (emdr) as a possible evidence-based rehabilitation treatment option for a patient with adhd and history of adverse childhood experiences: a case report study. Journal of Personalized Medicine, 13(2), 200. https://doi.org/10.3390/jpm13020200

  5. Dongen, H. P. A. V., Maislin, G., Mullington, J., & Dinges, D. F. (2003). The cumulative cost of additional wakefulness: dose-response effects on neurobehavioral functions and sleep physiology from chronic sleep restriction and total sleep deprivation. Sleep, 26(2), 117-126. https://doi.org/10.1093/sleep/26.2.117

  6. Waite R, Ramsay JR. Adults with ADHD: who are we missing? Issues Ment Health Nurs. 2010 Oct;31(10):670-8. doi: 10.3109/01612840.2010.496137. PMID: 20854040.

  7. Malwane M I, Nguyen E B, Trejo S, et al. (June 10, 2022) A Delayed Diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder in the Setting of Complex Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Cureus 14(6): e25825. doi:10.7759/cureus.25825.

  8. Faust DS, Walker D, Sands M. Diagnosis and Management of Childhood Bipolar Disorder in the Primary Care Setting. Clinical Pediatrics. 2006;45(9):801-808. doi:10.1177/0009922806295279

  9. Katzman, M. A., Bilkey, T. S., Chokka, P., Fallu, A., & Klassen, L. J. (2017). Adult adhd and comorbid disorders: clinical implications of a dimensional approach. BMC Psychiatry, 17(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/s12888-017-1463-3

  10. Youngstrom, E. A., Arnold, L. E., & Frazier, T. (2010). Bipolar and adhd comorbidity: both artifact and outgrowth of shared mechanisms.. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 17(4), 350-359. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1468-2850.2010.01226.

  11. Connolly, R. D. and Hesson, J. (2021). Investigating a self-management harm reduction strategy for symptoms of attention-deficit hyperactive disorder, nicotine dependence, alcohol use, and drug use.. https://doi.org/10.21203/rs.3.rs-1082733/v1

  12. Chang, Z., Lichtenstein, P., Halldner, L., D’Onofrio, B. M., Serlachius, E., Fazel, S., … & Larsson, H. (2013). Stimulant adhd medication and risk for substance abuse. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 55(8), 878-885. https://doi.org/10.1111/jcpp.12164

  13. West, S. L., Mulsow, M., & Arredondo, R. (2007). An examination of the psychometric properties of the attention deficit scales for adults with outpatient substance abusers. The American Journal of Drug and Alcohol Abuse, 33(5), 755-764. https://doi.org/10.1080/00952990600753883

  14.  Gunes S. Diagnostic confounding: is it absence epilepsy or ADHD? Dusunen Adam The Journal of Psychiatry and Neurological Sciences 2017;30:391-392. https://doi.org/10.5350/DAJPN2017300414

  15. Qian, QJ., Liu, J., Wang, YF. et al. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder comorbid oppositional defiant disorder and its predominately inattentive type: evidence for an association with COMT but not MAOA in a Chinese sample. Behav Brain Funct 5, 8 (2009). https://doi.org/10.1186/1744-9081-5-8

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

This online course has been designed specifically to help teach the strategies ADHD brains need to help them move from overwhelm  and meltdowns to confident emotional mastery.

Want to know more about
thriving with ADHD?

Check out these other articles:

Why they Unlock our Success and How to Craft the Best Ones for You

Does the mere word “routine” sound like both a panacea for all that feels wild and crazy in your life and also fill your soul with angst and dread?

Oh, you are so not alone.

Because the ADHD brain thrives on novelty and stimulation, the concept of routines can seem like both an impossible dream and a horrifying possibility. But routines—when crafted with your unique ADHD brain in mind—can actually be a secret weapon, providing stability and creating a sense of control to reduce stressful moments. 

ADHD and Routines

If you have an ADHD brain to call your own, you know that sticking to a routine can be one of the hardest challenges of all. When your brain is set to constantly crave new and stimulating experiences, doing something (or a set of things) in the same way over and over can feel not just restrictive but downright dull.

But there's good news! Routines don't have to be boring or limiting. They can be designed to fit the ADHD brain's need for variety while still providing structure. The key is to find the right balance.

Think of routines as a jazz improv sesh rather than your childhood scales practice. Your daily schedule doesn’t have to be the same note being played over and over (yawn). It can be more of a flexible structure that allows for spontaneous solos.

How does that work?!? You ask. I’m so glad you did.

Here’s an example:

Well, let’s just say you want to create a morning routine—something to set the day off in a way that assures all your needs are taken care of. Fantastic! Sounds like a wonderful idea. But how do you actually get that done?

Here’s what’s not going to work:

Well, rather than creating it in a way that makes you turn into a little productivity robot- mindlessly moving from one task to the next the same way each and every time (beep…boop…must brush teeth…beep….now wash face…).

The more ADHD-friendly alternative:

An ADHD-friendly routine leaves room for you to add your own personal sparkle by switching up the details

—today’s workout could be a brisk walk in the park, while tomorrow’s might be a dance-off in the living room.

— Or you might drink your morning coffee on the porch in a rainstorm today and cuddle in front of the fire tomorrow.

With some creativity and thought, your routines become more like friendly guiding prompts instead of carved-in-stone edicts.

The difference between habits and routines

Mixing up routines and habits is like mistaking a cat for a tiger— upon first glance, they look pretty darn similar, but in reality, one's a domestic fuzzball, and the other might eat you for breakfast (ok- maybe that’s not the best example- both habits and routines are more likely to get you fed for breakfast than eat you for breakfast)

Routines

Routines are a series of planned activities done in a specific order, often at a set time. Take a morning routine, for example, waking up, brushing your teeth, showering, and having breakfast. Each action is purposeful and tends to happen in order, making it easier for you to navigate your day knowing that the key things will happen.

While routines don’t happen on autopilot, like Habits, their benefit lies in their flexibility and intentionality. You can decide today that you want to start a new routine tomorrow, and with some planning– Voila! Routine started! Also, because routines are intentional, they allow for the sprinkling of variety and ADHD sparkle that I discussed above- letting you sub in one activity for another while keeping the same basic structure.

Habits

Habits, on the other hand, are behaviors that become automatic over time through repetition. They stem from consistent practice and often don't require conscious thought. For instance, tying your shoes or reaching for your phone when you hear a notification are habits that have been ingrained through frequent repetition. Unlike routines, which are designed and intentional, habits often operate almost on autopilot.

The beauty of habits lies in their efficiency. For our ADHD brains, provide a framework where actions can be performed without the heavy lifting of decision-making. When a behavior transitions into a habit, it frees up cognitive resources, allowing for better focus on tasks that require more attention.

The benefits of routines for ADHD brains

1. Reducing executive function meltdown

Ah, executive function—the brain’s circus juggler:  balancing the all-important tasks of planning, focusing, prioritizing, and more all at once! 

For an ADHD brain, these tasks can feel more like a never-ending, positively exhausting game of Whac-A-Mole.

Enter routines, the trusty sidekick swooping in to save the day! By creating a reliable pattern, routines lighten the mental load, freeing up precious brainpower for other fun activities (like trying to remember where we left our keys… again). Instead of burning energy pondering when to tackle the vacuum or fit in that Zumba class, a solid routine swoops in to do the thinking for us!

2. Beating decision fatigue

We all wake up everyday to face days positively bursting with decisions. 

What to wear? 

What to eat? 

Should I work out?  

What friends should I call? 

Each choice can feel like a mini-marathon, especially for an ADHD brain, leading to something we fondly refer to as decision fatigue. Routines simplifying our daily choices, and routines cut down the decision-making workload, helping us glide through the day with more pep in our step and less “Ugh, what should I do now?” spiraling.

3. Mastering task completion

If you’ve ever started something with the best intentions only to have it slip your mind like a bar of soap, you’re in good company! 

Routines work like a trusty checklist that gently nudges us to prioritize tasks and ensure those crucial items don’t get lost in the shuffle. Whether it’s remembering to take our meds or finishing that work project, we promise we’ll get to it eventually; routines help us stay on track.

Evening stretching session? ✔️ You bet we’re mastering that! Routines aren’t just helpful; they can become our superpower in turning “I forgot” into “Got it done!”

How to create effective routines

1. Set up morning and evening routines

Start with the basics: morning and evening routines. These are critical times when having a set pattern can make a huge difference. Mornings can include activities like exercise and planning the day, as well as any extras like journaling or mindfulness practices. Evenings might focus on winding down activities such as listening to soothing music or having a long bath.

Want a step-by-step guide for crafting an ADHD-friendly morning routine?  Check out our free downloadable system here.

2. Write it all down

Write down all the tasks that need to be included in the routine. Think through the best order to complete them and then outline this clearly, adding times. Post this schedule in prominent spots like the refrigerator or workspace to keep it visible and easy to access.

3. Set up adaptable routines

Life isn't always predictable, and that's okay. For those with varying schedules, consider creating A/B routines that differ according to daily commitments. This might take longer to set up but it also allows for flexibility while still maintaining structure. 

4. Include reminders and alarms

Using reminders and alarms can be a game-changer. Set alerts on phones or use physical timers to signal the start and end of routine activities. This helps keep track of things and confirms tasks are completed without drifting off course into a reverie or a three-hour YouTube binge.

5. Make it fun

Routines don’t have to feel serious and virtuous—instead, spice things up with fun elements. Play music during activities or create small rewards for completing tasks. Loaded the dishwasher? Great, now it’s time for a double chocolate chip cookie. Pleasure and rewards increase the likelihood of sticking to a routine.

6. Start small and build gradually

Creating a routine doesn’t have to be overwhelming—start with a few simple tasks and gradually add more as they become habitual. This approach makes it easier to adapt and stick to the routine over time. 

7. Account for downtime

No one is a robot (beep-beep), so don’t fall into the trap of stacking a day up with so many tasks that there are no breaks. After all, moments of relaxation are essential for recharging and preventing burnout. 

8. Prioritize flexibility

Life changes and so do circumstances, so be open to adjusting routines as needed. Flexibility helps routines remain relevant and effective, allowing for adaptations without feeling like a failure. Remember—a routine isn’t an army drill, it’s an aid to living a complex and changeable life to the fullest. So avoid any Full Metal Jacket vibes.

9. Use visual aids

Visual aids such as checklists and calendars can help keep routines on track. This provides a clear, tangible way to see what needs to be done and also offers a sense of accomplishment as tasks are checked off. Don’t be afraid to make visual aids colorful and fun—invest in DayGlo Post-its and glitter pens, if that works.

10. Find accountability partners

Body doubling is a powerful ADHD hack and can either mean performing a task with another person, or just having a cheerleading accountability partner. So aim to share routines with loved ones or ADHD support groups. Having someone to check in with can offer motivation and camaraderie, making it easier to stick to the routine. 

11. Evaluate and adjust regularly

It’s okay to switch up routines, so take time to evaluate how it’s all going. Is more downtime essential? Should fewer tasks be packed into one day? Make adjustments as needed to improve effectiveness and ensure routines meet changing goals. 

12. Celebrate successes

Don’t forget to celebrate small wins. If a routine has been followed for a week or even a day, maybe a treat or a self-cheer is in order. Positive reinforcement boosts motivation and underlines the benefits of sticking to routines, making it easier to stay on the train.

ADHD and routines? They can be the best of friends

Routines may seem daunting for an ADHD brain that loves novelty and spontaneity, but they can be incredibly empowering. By reducing the mental load (including decision fatigue) and making sure crucial tasks get done, routines offer stability and control and are key to that all-fabulous feeling of “I’ve got this!”.

With a little planning and flexibility, routines can be tailored to fit your life and your brain.

Join the conversation

How do you feel about routines? Which ones have worked well for you? Share your experiences with us in the comments below!

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The Surprising Truth of the Default Mode Network

You’re staring at your computer screen, one sentence of the report written– it took 45 minutes of hard effort to get here… And suddenly, you’re no longer thinking about this quarter’s earnings, instead, you’re right back at the awkward bar-b-que last weekend, replaying it all in your head:

What did my sister-in-law mean by that comment, exactly?  Why is she always so judgemental?   Oh, how I wish I could say what I really want to say.  But maybe she didn’t mean anything by it.   She’s actually pretty kind- everyone else thinks she’s great.  I’m always reading the worst into things.  Ugh… no wonder she doesn’t like me.

It’s the endless chatter, the ruminations, and obsessive thinking that act as a siren call for your brain, drawing you away from focus and direction and towards circling thoughts soaked in emotion.

What’s going on? It’s your overactive default mode network.

What’s the Default Mode Network?

The default mode network is the network of brain regions and activities involved when your brain isn’t focused on a goal-directed activity.  So when you’re sitting at your desk, staring out the window, in the shower, driving on an endless highway, or your mind has wandered during a lecture- that’s when your brain enters the default mode network.  It’s the brain regions at play when you’re daydreaming, recalling memories, thinking about the future, etc.

I like to think of the default mode network as our brain at recess.  It’s wandering wherever it feels like; one minute, it’s on the slide, the next, it’s headed over to the swings, and a few minutes after that, it’s doing the monkey bars over and over again.

Our brains do the same thing- thinking about one thing and then the next.  But because the default mode network incorporates the memory and feeling centers of the brain, a lot of the “playing” that your brain does here can be very emotional and often focused on the past.

But recess isn’t the only place your brain hangs out during the day.  It also gets to work with a network called the task-positive network.

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What’s the Task Positive Network?

The task-positive network (or TPN) is the part of our brain that’s responsible for goal-directed activity.  This is the network of brain regions that lights up when we focus on a task that requires conscious attention.  The task-positive network involves more of our frontal cortex (the part of our brain responsible for rational, sequential thought) and less of the emotional and personal memory stores.

The TPN is where our brain goes when it’s called in from recess.  It’s the brain hard at work: studying, learning, creating, and problem-solving.

ADHD and the Default Mode Network

All brains have TPNs and DMNs.  But ADHD brains have a particularly hard time leaving recess— not just because recess is compelling but because an ADHD brain’s Default mode network doesn’t turn off when the task-positive network turns on, like a neurotypical brain does.  

It’s as if the classroom and the playground have no wall between them- just desks set up right next to some of the most colorful, intriguing, and interesting playground equipment you can imagine.  So even if an ADHD brain comes in and sits down at their desk, the siren call of the slide and monkey bars starts calling pretty quickly, and pretty soon, it just gets up and wanders on over to start playing.

What does that mean? 

Well, it means it’s going to get a lot less work done, but it also has some other difficult impacts as well:

ADHD Distraction

Having the monkey bars set up right next to your desk can make it pretty hard to stay focused and on track.  Because that playground, the area of your brain where it gets to follow every impulse and interest, never goes away.  It’s like your brain is playing 2 channels at the same time- C-span and Bravo.  Sure, one may be more important for your life, but those real housewives- they’re pretty compelling.  So you’re constantly flipping back and forth- hearing the siren call of the DMN again the minute you finally get settled in and back to work. Over and over again.

ADHD Obsessive Thinking

Because the brain gets to wander anywhere it wants on the playground, it’s able to stay stuck in one spot- swinging on the swings for hours on end or going up and down the slide over and over again.  And because this default mode network playground is so compelling, it very often does do just that, gets stuck on one line of thought over and over again.

This is where obsessive and ruminative thinking comes from in ADHD brains.  It’s the endless loop of one activity over and over again, and because there is no purpose or goal, the brain gets to stay there.  So that little comment your sister-in-law made at the BBQ?  It gets played on repeat.

Anxiety and Depression

As anyone who has survived elementary school can attest to, as much as we want our playgrounds to be only places of fun, laughter, and friendships— sometimes it’s anything but. 

In fact, playgrounds can be torture. 

And the default mode playground is no different. Because it’s a place of purposeless emotion, memory, and forecasting, it’s ripe for depression and anxiety- being a spot where our brain will circle over and over on the most emotionally compelling (i.e., dark, negative, and fear-inducing) thoughts.

So, the brain you were born with built the classroom outside on the playground. How are you supposed to keep it off the slide and focus on its work?!?

Well, there are a variety of things you can do to help keep that brain off the slide and back at its desk. Check out the next post on:

7 Proven Techniques to Tame Your Default Mode Network and Boost Your Focus

What have you noticed about your DMN? Is it a happy playground or one full of darkness? Share in the comments below!

Resources:

1. Garrison KA, Zeffiro TA, Scheinost D, Constable RT, Brewer JA. Meditation leads to reduced default mode network activity beyond an active task. Cogn Affect Behav Neurosci. 2015 Sep;15(3):712-20. doi: 10.3758/s13415-015-0358-3. PMID: 25904238; PMCID: PMC4529365.

2. Liddle, E. B., Hollis, C., Batty, M. J., Groom, M. J., Totman, J. J., Liotti, M., ... & Liddle, P. F. (2011). Task‐related default mode network modulation and inhibitory control in ADHD: Effects of motivation and methylphenidate. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 52(7), 761-771.

3. Uddin, L. Q., Kelly, A. C., Biswal, B. B., Margulies, D. S., Shehzad, Z., Shaw, D., ... & Milham, M. P. (2008). Network homogeneity reveals decreased integrity of default-mode network in ADHD. Journal of neuroscience methods, 169(1), 249-254.

4. Rubia, Katya, Analucia Alegria, and Helen Brinson. "Imaging the ADHD brain: disorder-specificity, medication effects and clinical translation." Expert review of neurotherapeutics 14.5 (2014): 519-538.

5. Westbrook, Andrew, and Todd S. Braver. "Dopamine does double duty in motivating cognitive effort." Neuron 89.4 (2016): 695-710.

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Planning. Did you just do a little internal groan? I know, I know. It’s ADHD Voldemort- the evil thing that shan’t be named because so many ADHD brains have such a painful history with the practice.

It’s the thing you’ve been told for years is what you need to do. You probably have a box in the back of your closet of old dusty planners, with exactly 1 1/2 weeks filled out. Or maybe you’ve gotten on planning kicks before and they kept you on the ball but they also kept you miserable and tormented because you felt hemmed in and reprimanded by it all.

I hear ya. Planning gets a bad rap for good reason. It’s not very ADHD-friendly. But… and here’s the big but- it’s also one of the most ADHD-friendly things you can do for your brain. How can both things be true?

Well. The act of planning? That’s hard. Really hard for ADHD brains. But having a plan? Well, that, my friends, is ADHD gold. Not because a plan means you will do everything in the way you planned. Not because the plan is there to torture you about all you didn’t do. But because planning externalizes your executive functioning system and makes your life work for your brain. And that, right there, is exactly what we’re after- making your life work for your brain.

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How? You ask. Well, a lot of reasons. But let’s start with the top 10:

The Top 10 Reasons why Planning may be exactly what your ADHD Brain Needs

1.    Using a planner saves executive functioning energy

This is by far the biggest reason to use a planner with ADHD. When you have ADHD, you have a limited supply of executive functioning energy so you want to make sure you don’t waste a drop.  Every time you stop a task, then think about what the next thing is you are going to do, plan that next task and start it- you have used up 4 different stores of that precious executive functioning energy.   When you plan ahead of time, however, you batch that executive functioning heavy task at the beginning. This saves your valuable resources and leaves you with more executive functioning energy to spend throughout your day- when you really need it- like focusing on that big project you have due tomorrow.

2.    Planners ease anxiety

Anxiety and ADHD are some of the world’s oldest frenemies. They love to hate each other and hate to love each other. Because while anxiety can keep ADHD on track, it can also keep it sidelined when the tasks, to-dos, appointments, and projects loom so large everything else- anything else- becomes more appealing.

But what’s the antidote to anxiety? Action.

Planning gives your brain exactly that- a plan of action to tackle all the things. Will you get it all done? Probably not. Will it all go according to plan? Oh heck no! But, because you’re planning, you can reassess, reconfigure and reprioritize whenever you need to.

3.    Planners make space for the other stuff

If there is any one phrase that ADHD brains live by it’s “out of sight out of mind” because when something disappears from sight (or awareness) it ceases to exist. So what do brilliant ADHD brains do to make up for this? Why, try to keep it all in mind at all times, of course! But when the milk you need to pick up on the way home, is squashed into your brain with your mother’s birthday party, the annual review due next Friday, and your son’s permission slip—- there's not much room for anything else.

Getting all of those details onto paper and establishing a plan to tackle them? That frees up space for everything else- like how to ask your boss for that raise, the deliriously happy sound of your son laughing at breakfast this morning, or what your fantasy football picks are going to be this year.

4.  Planners ease intention transforming into action

It’s the details that so often throw off a plan or a day: the forgotten gym clothes, the missing lunch, the too-short travel time, etc.  These are the details that keep you from what you set out to do.  But, when you plan your day ahead of time, you have an external workspace to figure those things out.  Are you going to the gym tomorrow morning, showering, and heading to work right from there?  It’s going to help to pack a bag of work clothes, and toiletries as well as layout your clothes for the gym tonight.  Have a meeting 30 minutes away?  You’ll need to leave at least half an hour ahead of time. Planners give you the space and the cue to think through and prepare for all those details.

5. Planning helps you manage time even when you’re not planning

ADHD brains don’t have the “Time Lexicon” that most neurotypical brains have. This means they don’t have a running encyclopedia of known amounts of time for tasks- partly because even if an ADHD brain was going to try to figure out how long something took- halfway through the task it would be on to the next. And it’s pretty hard to show up on time when you don’t know how long all the things you have to do to get there take.

Planning builds up those time lexical stores by creating 100s of little time experiments. When you first start planning, you may look at your tasks and say “I have no idea how long that will take” but then you guess. And you’ll probably be wrong. That’s ok- because now you know and the next time you’re going to come closer. And the more you play the game of the time scientist—- the easier it’s going to be to estimate your time.

6.    Planning helps you sleep.

You probably already know by now that sleep is one of the most fundamental aspects of ADHD care. Sleep fills up that executive functioning gas tank and keeps you on task and in control during your day. But despite the power of sleep for ADHD brains, it doesn’t happen by itself (in fact, humans are the only mammals that resist the urge to sleep!). Not only do we need to get ourselves into bed but we need to slow down, chill out, and just generally turn off our brains so they get to switch over to dreamland.

Planning not only helps you see when you need to get to sleep in order to feel your best in the morning, but it helps you plan that wind-down time to help that sleep actually happen when you close your eyes.

7.    Planning helps you say no.

If your 10 appointments, 5 meetings, and 16 weekly tasks only live in your head, then when your Great Aunt Mildred calls to have you water her prize-winning Begonias next week- you may think- Sure! What’s one more thing? I always figure it out. But if you’re following the 3-step system for ADHD-friendly planning, you’ll know you only have 2 microscopic time windows and so that 3rd watering? Well, that one has to be done by your cousin Jim.

Planning gives you daily insight into how much time you have (and I know- sometimes that’s exactly why people resist planning). But when you know how much time you have, and you know how long things take (see #5) you get really clear on what you can… and can’t do.

8. Planning lets you get to the good stuff.

Even if you’re one of the supremely lucky ones who love their work- it can’t be your only love. We’re all complex, multifaceted people, and each facet of ourselves and our passions- need to be shined. Planning lets you do just that. When you plan your work, you’re more able to get it done, leaving room for the other parts of you. And when do you plan the other stuff? Guess what? The work gets done faster too!

9. Planning helps you create balance (and prepare for when you’re not)

I look like a 3-year-old starting a coloring project, using 5 different colored erasable pens when I plan my day:  purple for me, pink for clients, blue for writing, green for family, and orange for my relationship.  This way, when I look at my week, I know if I am planning to spend my time in a way that feels balanced and even.  Some days and weeks are a lovely rainbow. Other weeks are a whole lot of pink or blue. That’s okay- seeing the balance-or lack thereof - helps me prepare myself (and my family) and tells me where I need to balance out next week.

10. Planning creates a sense of ease and control

Holding it all in your head or putting fires out as they come running at you makes it hard to feel in control. But when you map it out from the beginning— adding, subtracting, and editing all along the way- it takes flooding and overwhelm and transforms it to superhero level “I’ve got this.” Because in our heads, plans are just an opportunity for unrealized intentions and anxiety. But on paper? Well, that creates action!

So go ahead. Dig out that old planner from the pile, dust it off, and try out my 3-step system for ADHD-friendly planning. It may just be the transformation your life needed to better fit your brain!

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5 Questions to ask a therapist before starting ADHD therapy

(and the answers to watch out for)

I have seen thousands of people with ADHD brains transformed by ADHD therapy.  Almost all of my clients come to me feeling like “a mess.” They are mad at themselves, confused why they can’t do what they know they should do and secretly (or not so secretly) feeling like they are inherently “lazy” or “stupid” or “crazy.”  They leave therapy knowing what they have to offer the world, feeling good about themselves for it and knowing how to get themselves to bring all that goodness out. 

That’s what therapy can do- it can reduce shame and guilt about symptoms, come up with novel, individualized solutions for symptoms, help facilitate communication in ADHD relationships and help people develop lives that work for their brains rather than force their brains into patterns and systems that just will never fit.

 But, unfortunately, good ADHD therapy can be hard to find.  They don’t teach how to work with adults with ADHD in school.  You have to seek out your own training to really do it right.

And doing ADHD therapy isn’t for everyone.  There are loads of amazing therapists that I know- kind, loving, brilliant clinicians that I would jump at the chance to send friends and family members to but that I would NEVER send someone with ADHD to.  Because ADHD therapy needs to be approached differently than other therapies.  Both the practical (time management, planning, organization etc.) and emotional (guilt, shame, anxiety, etc) aspects the ADHD experience need to be addressed.  And a lot of those kind, loving brilliant clinicians are thrilled to talk about the emotional implications all day long but they just really don’t want to get their hands dirty with that practical stuff.

In order to make sure you are putting your hard-earned time and money into the best treatment for you and your brain, you want to ask any therapist you are working with these 5 questions.  But be careful! Watch out for the answers that are red flags that you should run far and fast.

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1.     What is your approach/ style/ orientation when working with ADHD clients?

Understanding how a clinician works with ADHD clients is an essential first question.  This will give you an idea of both the methods that they use as well their general style and orientation to working with clients.  

Ideally, a therapist will take a collaborative approach- they will partner with you (the real expert on your life) and help you find novel solutions and generate alternative perspectives.

You may also hear a therapist say that they use cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or solutions-focused therapy as a basis for their work with ADHD.  These are both highly effective treatments that work to target both the thoughts and behaviors that are no longer working in your life.  There is a lot of great evidence to support CBT and Solutions focused work for adult ADHD and it should always be at least part of any ADHD treatment module.

Answer to watch out for: Run far and fast from therapists that say they use an exclusively “psychodynamic or psychoanalytic” approach to working with ADHD.  These are wonderful, effective treatments for many disorders. But they are not only largely ineffective for ADHD, they can even be harmful by inadvertently adding to the shame and quilt that so many adults with ADHD already feel.

2.     How much experience and training do you have working with clients with ADHD?

The more experience and training a therapist have with working with people with ADHD the better.  Though, the more experience and training any therapist has the higher their rates will be and just because someone doesn’t have years of experience working with ADHD in particular doesn’t mean they can’t do great work, particularly with good training.

 That being said- if you can afford it- finding a therapist with at least several years of ADHD specific experience is likely to make your work smoother and faster.

3.     Do you believe in using medication, nutrition, or exercise as adjuncts to treatment?

Research shows that additive treatments for ADHD are the most effective and long-lasting- so combining therapy with medication and lifestyle changes like nutrition, meditation, and exercise. But sticking to all these different regimens that can be so helpful can feel impossible with an ADHD brain! This is where good therapy backs a double punch. Good ADHD therapy not only will address the behaviors and thinking patterns that are no longer working in your life but will help you establish new routines and patterns that can add up and bring real relief to your symptoms.

Watch out for: Any therapist who is so steadfast and single-minded in their approach that they don’t recognize the value in alternative, complementary methods is someone to stay away from.  The research is clear on the effectiveness of all of those methods and if they are warning you away from any of them on principle alone, they are either not aware of or trusting in the scientific research that has been done.  Not, someone you want to work with.

4.     What can I expect to gain from treatment?

This is a hard one to answer because what you get out of treatment depends largely on what you put into it and most therapists should be forthcoming with this.  But you also want to know that the therapist you are speaking to has had good results with other people.  Have they seen people make substantive progress through their work?  What types of progress do they see?  Do clients make progress on logistical/ practical issues as well as the way they feel about themselves? 

Watch out for:  Therapists that over promise- no therapist can guarantee results- there are too many variables at play.  If a therapist tells you, they can promise that you will have huge results- run.  Don’t walk.  Run.

5.     How do you work with the practical issues (like planning or organization) of ADHD?

ADHD therapy is a bit of a different beast than traditional talk therapy for issues like anxiety, depression or grief.  You want a therapist who will take an active role.  Someone that will offer suggestions and team up with you to find solutions that work for YOUR life.  It will not help (and may even hurt) if a therapist offers solutions like “just use a planner” or “try setting a timer”. These strategies are not bad necessarily but good ADHD work gets into the nitty gritty of making these strategies work- HOW to use a planner, WHEN to plan, HOW to remember to plan and check the planner, WHY the planner is useful as well as exploring what history and feelings you might have around planning.  Make sure that any therapist you work with is willing to get their hands dirty on these topics.  Are they willing to, each week, check in on the strategies you came up with and problem solve with you to optimize them for your life?  If so, you’ve got a keeper!

Watch out for:  Therapists that have a passive or exploratory style.  Therapists that don’t feel comfortable addressing the small details of HOW to make solutions work for you. Therapists that have ONE strategy that they offer everyone- no single ADHD brain is built like any other and therefore no one strategy can be effective for every ADHD brain.

Therapy is a hugely effective tool for adults with ADHD, with a little research, searching and effort you can find a therapist who can team up with you to help you develop a life that releases your creative genius and is optimized for your brain.

Ready to shift from
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